I need to move to Plan B and do it tonight. It's been a year without my husband showing any signs of adjusting his behavior. (He isn't having an affair, but Steve H. did say Plan B is a big option.)<p>I've been working with Steve off and on, but my husband refuses to any counselor or talk to anyone about our marriage. He only read the books last week after I told him I wanted out.<p>Still, the only message he brought away is that I should take an interest in his recreation. Note the pronouns.<p>I want to tell him to leave tonight. My next appt. with Steve isn't until April 2. If I wait that long, I'll either be picking up loose men or incarcerated for 2nd degree murder. Or perhaps in an Ashrum. Please give me any advice possible.

green:<p>Arent all of us men "loose"? And why 2nd degree murder? Why not 1st Degree? IF your going to do it do it right......LOL. <p>just thought I would try to make you laugh<p>Your trying to force a reaction. If you really feel that Plan B is right for you then you should do it the correct way and make sure that you have a plan to impliment your plan B. Plan B should be done in a loving way. <p>I have not done a Plan B. I have thought about it. I am the BS. But I dont think I have acrried out Plan A correctly yet. <p>your not going to change him and you not going to control his actions by threats. <p>you need to work on yourself and let him see that. <p>good luck

Hey Green,
Just a thought..if he wants you to participate in his stuff..go for it.<p>Like your H, my SO didn't read, didn't want counselours and the only thing he came up with was 15 hours recreation...so you know what? I went for it. He's a golfer..had him get me some clubs, teach me and started playing with him.<p>I often joke that golf is what saved us..but it is partly true...we started talking...I kept to no LB's and Plan A, we started playing 2-3 times a week..and talking more, and pretty soon we were discussing things OFF the golf course...important stuff he never wanted to discuss previously.<p>See, what happened is we became friends again..and by spending more time with him, he could see first hand the changes I made were real and permanent. And he began to trust that I wouldn't blow-up, blame, or nag anymore.<p>If your love is completely slipping away..then yeah..plan B makes sense. BUT..if you're simply burnt out from not getting responses and cooperation from him..then turn the tables and give him what he wants..a playmate. (one who doesn't LB)
T