I looked over my H's email accounts this morning. He gave me all of them and the passwords and told me to take a look whenever I wanted to to see who he is talking to. I don't obsess over them, I only check them every couple of days, especially since the OW never emails him.<p>Anyways, in his main one that the OW used to email him at, he had quite a few saved emails from her and ones he had sent. Well, as of this morning, ALL of them are deleted. Everything all nice and clean, and the emails we had sent each other, nicely saved in his favorites folder. I'm taking this as a positive sign. I haven't heard from him since last Wednesday night becaues he said he wanted us to both take a week to make sure that we both really wanted to work things out, me especially, because he can't figure out how I could still love him after what he's done to me.<p>So, this is a good sign, right?!?!

Here is where you're at...
...in "Surviving An Affair"(SAA)<p> <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>An affair is a very powerful addiction. (page 56 of SAA)<hr></blockquote>
How to tell a lover that the relationship is over letter(on page 58-59 of SAA)
Extraordinary precautions must be taken to guarantee separation...

1. Changing jobs and relocating (Situation dependent)
2. Blocking all communication (phone, e-mail, pager, etc.)
3. Accounting for time
4. Accounting for money
5. Spending leisure time together

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Easy access to a former lover must be avoided at all costs. (page 60 of SAA)<hr></blockquote>
<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>A secret life depends not only on hidden time, but also on hidden money. (page 62 of SAA)<hr></blockquote><p> [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Jim/NSR

Ok, so NSR, what are you saying, or quoting I should say? [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

Hi,<p>At first glance it looks wonderful as I'm sure you want to see those things happening. I don't want to be negative, but don't be so quick to be satisfied. I think this is a positive step, but look for the long term changes.<p>Do you have the book Surviving An Affair? That's what NSR is quoting from and he linked to it at the beginning of his post. <p>My H gave me access to his emails too right after he started a free web based email account that I was unaware of.<p>I suggest you look for consistency and long term!<p>Keep up the good work...<p> [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>P.S... What did you do nice for yourself lately?

Yep...Free2BMe read and understood my intent!<p>When you move into "recovery..."
...a true recovery...
...after the WS sends the formal "No Contact" letter... to the OP...<p>...the start of trust building...
...is when the WS can agree to... lay it all out in front of you...
...since this is how The Rule of Honesty:[/b] Be totally open and honest with your spouse.... works!<p>And...<p>You are to offer to your WS a complete openness of yourself too!<p> [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Jim/NSR