I am new to this forum,but I already feel at home.
I need some advice ASAP about my marriage. I read all through this web site, and I can't find anything that tells a "wife what to do when her husband wants a divorce",I did find the reverse of this and Dr.Harley said he would write about what to do when a husband wants a divorce, but I haven't found it.
Here is some background on my marriage: Married 13 yrs, 1 son age 12,husband became a Christian in '92, and I thought I did too. But this wasn't my time as I soon learned. Husband has always shown love and care for me. After a few years of us going to church, I started not going as much.
I didn't know why at the time,but it was satan tearing us apart. As time has gone on, my husband is still very active in church, he has been on mission trips, teaches Sunday school, he is now the Pastor of children's church. I have been mean to him with my angry words and outbursts. I know I failed to be the supportive wife he needs. He left me 6 weeks ago, and he told me he was not in love with me. He was tired of the battle. He also took our son. I have been in almost constant prayer and fasting, begging God to please give me a chance to prove my love. I got Saved!during one of my long prayers with God. I have also given God my marriage and asked for him to restore us to a solid Christian family. I speak to my husband on the phone every couple of days,when I call to speak to my son. I try to say things that want upset him. I try to "admire" all the qualities I love about him, but he will not listen and takes the defensive. For example: I told him I watched him on t.v. and I enjoyed his testimony and that I knew God was alive in him. He told me it was a slap in the face, because he had tired for years to get me to understand what God was doing in his life. I told him, calmly, yes,but I was lost and I didn't understand what you had to say. He says there is no way he will ever come back to me. I told him, he had no control over what God has planned. He says that he is a peace with God about this decision, if that is so, then I feel like the Bible is misleading, because the only reason God gives for divorce is adultery. No if's and's or buts. I know the Bible isn't misleading and I know he knows that, he is just refusing to accept it. I believe he has found someone else, it would explain all the mean, hateful,abussive things he has been saying to me.
He tells me I have never loved him. I know I didn't always show him, but I have always loved him, and I want him to come home and lets work this out and serve God together. I feel this is what God wants for us. I would like to know what some of you think? I know this man loves me. I
know him. Do you think he may be teaching me a lesson for the times I treated him so bad? Is it possible to get him to believe and trust me? IF so how? I know it will not be easy to heal us,and I know it will take time, but I know we are worth it and so is our son. Please offer any advice,and if you know where the Dr. may have posted about "husbands that want a divorce" please let me know. Thank you, and God Bless. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Hi, 4eTs. We are all happy to see you found MB and welcome you.

First, I can't find anything either regarding a husband wanting a divorce. Maybe someone else can shed some light on that. You might get some good advice if you post on the "Divorce" forum.

However, I do have a few comments:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by 4everTs:
<strong>I didn't know why at the time,but it was satan tearing us apart</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Exactly... Satan is working overtime to tear your marriage apart. DON'T give up. Always remember that through faith, God will prevail over the powers of Satan. Prayer is very powerful. I was given a book by my pastor called "The Power of a Praying Husband" by Stormie Omartian. She also write the counter "The Power of a Praying Wife". Get ahold of a copy off the internet or bookstore. It will help strengthen your faith in God, and teaches how to pray for your spouse.

I have no doubt in my mind that my prayers are being answered. God performs miracles everyday... and He can save your marriage. Just don't expect it to happen overnite. God teaches us patience, forgiveness, and understanding. Continue to pray diligently, and through faith, you will see the spirit of God working in your husband. Put your marriage in God's hands and continue to pray for guidance.

A good website you should check out is www.rejoiceministries.org. It's very inspirational.

It's my personal opinion and belief that "fasting" is unnecessary. It will make you weak at a time when you need to gather all of your stength to make it day by day. Fasting will also make your mind weak and difficult to concentrate. Once again, that is just a personal belief. Speak w/ your minister about it.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by 4everTs:
<strong>...then I feel like the Bible is misleading, because the only reason God gives for divorce is adultery. No if's and's or buts. I know the Bible isn't misleading and I know he knows that, he is just refusing to accept it.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">The Bible is misleading at times... sometimes contradictary. But that is the role of your minister to interpret (for lack of a better word) the Word of God. Set up an appointment w/ your minister. I'm sure he will be happy to spend some time with you. That's what he is for... to help you with struggles such as this.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by 4everTs:
<strong>I believe he has found someone else, it would explain all the mean, hateful,abussive things he has been saying to me.
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You may be right... but if it is true, it will eventually surface. But, you should read as much as you can on this MB website. It offers much insite on marriage and affairs. And continue to post here. You can learn much from the advice and opinions of others.

So, my advice to you now is to read... read... read what this MB website has to offer. I'm sure others that are much wiser than I will offer you advice as well. Just, don't give up.

Continue in your faith... you will become strong.

I hope it helps.

tjs

<small>[ September 03, 2002, 11:48 PM: Message edited by: thejohnsmith ]</small>