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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 2 |
Can you start Plan A without an active commitment by the WS? My WS seems to be saying that, yes, she'll give reconciliation a chance, but her approach is very passive - sort of like if it doesn't measure up she'll keep her options open with OM.
By the way, my WS's OM is her business partner in a small jointly owned retail business. How does the WS stop seeing the OM when the OM is her business partner?
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,166
Member
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Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,166 |
Plan A is ONLY for when the WS is not committed, or is still in an A, or when a spouse is in withdrawal for some reason other than an A. See: What Are Plan A and Plan B? and Zorweb on Plan A and Cerri on Plan A You will not recover your marriage whiel she remains in business with that partner. Period. No contact is imperative. Sell out, quit, whatever. I'm sorry to be so extreme, but that is reality.
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Joined: May 2003
Posts: 2
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: May 2003
Posts: 2 |
That's depressing, because I think she'll choose her business (and thus the OM) over me and our relationship. It is her source of fun, pride and reward and something she has worked very hard at and become very successful with. It is also her financial retirement and back up if our marriage dissolves.
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Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,166
Member
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Member
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 2,166 |
Yeah, my wife was getting her most important EN's met through her job, too. Workaholism is a type of affair, IMO.
OK, she buys out OM. BUT - you gotta get involved in meeting her EN's and being the fun part of her life, or she jsut goes from a human affair partner to a job as an affair partner.
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