my H. and i went to newport for the weekend. weel the inn sucked so we went to another one much better. but then saturday around 11 a.m. it started to rain we went to the mansions and then the chowder festival then headed home. my H. tried to be intimate first time since A but he couldn't i really didn't feel like it either, but i would have if he could have. he couldn't perform. i can't help but wonder why? he does have to take viagra. but it didn't work. is it guilt? is it he really has no feelings for me anymore? or is it just to soon? it has been 19 days n/c with o/w. then i think well he wouldn't try at all if there is nothing there. i just don't know i think sometimes i think too much! what do you think?

Hello dekicks,

The sex thing may just be nerves of not were to start or fear of letting down that wall. Maybe skip the sex in the fullest of sense. Try rebuilding with just snuggling, light touching in an unpreasured way (other zones), hand holding etc.

As A man I know I got great pleasure out of just pleasing my wife. Maybe the both of you could just work on you without the pressure for him to preform.

He may also be afraid that he might call out her name. Be prepared for this. Talk about that happening with him. If he called your name before he may call out hers.

I have a question for you.

When the affair was beginning to fall did he become angry at you and the world?

Did he insist that your marriage was over?

Did he seem further away and more resitant during the the fall of the affiar. Almost defiant to what was happening and not looking in you direction?

I've posted just below you in the board. Thank-you

BTW - My wife has just been dumped by her married affair partner.