I am thinking about moving to Plan B, because I am thinking about giving up. I am losing my love for him everytime I see him. He is just not the person I fell in love with. I am having a hard time believing that he could do this to me and the kids. I am still feeling resentment and anger I guess and it frightens me. I have not confronted or anything, but it is hard. I also just want to ask him "Don't you miss us?". Of course I didn't, but I just wanted to so bad. I am not sure what to do anymore. I asked him to keep S overnight this Sat. One because he hasn't yet and I have had all the responsibility and I need a break. Two because it takes him away from one of his only nights with OW. Mean I know but they are going to have to face this reality eventually why not now. I am also not going to let him take S every Sat. I am going to stick to the every other. That is the way it will be eventually so he might as well get used to it. I am not sure what I am going to do. Angry and confused about everything.

NY,

Wsit till the experts to give you advice before any move. Calming yourself down will make better decision.

Try to wait a little longer. Yes it is unbelievable how they can just dump their families like they do.

I am like you, only I'm fairly sure I don't want my H back. Of course, my kids are out of the house, so that makes a big difference.

Look at all the time and energy that is spent here, trying to undo the awful choices WS's make. It's a shame how many people they hurt.

Believer maybe you are right. It will only be three weeks since he left this Sunday. I just thought it would get easier to see him when he comes and it isn't. I just don't want to lose all the love I have for him all together. Trying to keep the faith. I pray for guidance every day for me and the miserable SOB and the kids. I hope he shows me a sign soon on which way to go.

My H completely was out of my life for 4 months, then started coming around. So don't give up hope. The only problem is that you have to start Plan B before your love for him is gone.

Thanks Believer for support. The problem with Plan B is.....I won't get to see him at all and I will at least miss that. And I am so scared he will just forget about me all together. I could never forget about him. I am very sad tonight. I am going to sleep and see how I feel in the morning.

Don't be afraid of Plan B. It is actually very comforting. But I think you need to spend a little more time in Plan A.

In the meantime, keep working on yourself.

Thanks Believer for believing in me. I am doing my best. We have been having a lot of appts. lately so that has been keeping my mind off of things. Trying very hard to stay in plan A. I have not called him for anything at all. Actually the whole thing is very confusing to me because according to Chris-CA the 180 list and Dr. Harleys MB don't go together at all. He said Dr. Harley does't recommend the 180 list. He said calling is not a LB to reread the book. What do you think about all of this stuff?

<small>[ March 05, 2004, 02:51 PM: Message edited by: KitG ]</small>

Thanks for YO. I just wanted to make sure that major exposure is good.....because I just did the big one. I called a girl at WH work and told her and she is telling everyone. Her H works with my WH, apparently not that many people know if any. She is going to tell her H, he will definitely give my WH an earful. He hates cheating and he is a very outspoken person with a loud voice. He will be giving my WH crap for the next three months about who the OW is. The OW does not have a good name for herself at the work place. Apparently this is in her nature to do these types of things. Cross your fingers for me. I am waiting for that phone all with him just as angry as a bees nest. I will keep you posted. I am exposing to the max now. I hope he is embarrassed as all hell about his A and the OW.

Think about relatives and other friends to. Good luck to you HopelessinNY.

Midwest

MW,

Unfortunately WH whole family already know. They said that although they don't condone what he is doing they have to support his decisions because they love him. So that is where that stands. Pretty much no one cares and his mother is a Sunday school teacher and very religious. She doesn't even call here to see how things are going or anything. You can always tell which side they end up on no matter who is in the wrong.