Today is not a good day for me.I'm so depressed and don't know what to do.Is this normal? I really need someone to talk to so I hope someone out there responds to this.Well, here is how I feel and what has been going on.
Friday night the OW came to my house While H was here and showed her butt and he told her he loved me and wanted me.
Saturday he slept all day (he is staying at brothers house)I called and left message that I was just calling to see how he was doing.He called me back when he got up and said he was depressed about what he had done to both of us,all the lies and everything.We talked for awhile and decided we would go get a bite to eat after my D came over to see him .In the meantime I went to the store to pick up some soft drinks and while I was gone he called to say he was ready but I was not here so he thought I left to get something to eat by myself.When he never called I road by his brothers house and saw his truck was gone and instant panic and hurt came over me.I thought he was with her so I went back home and paced the hose till I couldn't stand it anymore and I road by there again.Still no truck so I got out and knocked on the door and NO answer so the fear just swelled up in me that he was with her.Well,I decided I would go to the wal-mart and try to kill some time when I passed him so I turned around and went to his brothers house and he was taking stuff out of the truck. he and his brother went grocery shopping.I felt relived but embarresed that I did this so I talked to him maybe 20mins. and he said he was depressed about it all and that he did not want to come home till he knew that he wouldn't hurt me antmore that he loved me but he didn't want to rush things ,he needed to know he was going home for the right reasons. I understand it but it hurts like heck.He also said that he would not talk to her anymore and if she called there and left a message he would tell me about it. he also said he might have to tell her not to call and I suggested the NC letter to him.
Sunday(today)he has not called and my oldest D called him and his brother said he was gone.So I talked to him and he said H had said he needed to get away from everyone and just think about everything that he has done that he did not want to see me or her and he didn't want to feel any kind of pressure--JUST THINK. so here I sit all depressed and hurt and wanting him to come home or just call so I know he is OK and not with her.
How can a person love so much with all the hurt and still love? I really do love him and I pray he still loves me.
Is it normal for the WH to act this way?
Could he be still playing games?
IS there any way to get through this without going insane?
Someone please respond because you are all I have. Am i crazy?
PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AS I WILL PRAY FOR YOU ALL

No he is addicted, and like an addict, needs his fix. But it is a very, very good sign that he is sorry. Most are not, at this stage.

You need to get in Plan A and stay there. Then go on with your life. Don't focus so much on him. I know it is hard, but necessary. That is the way to get your husband back.

WH brother just called and said WH called and said he was all by himself and was OK and just trying to think and sort things out.now is this a normal thing for a WS to do?

L/L, you got the best suppot here. Believer is a GOD sent. Everything WH does and says is normal according to the addiction theorey. We BS just have to swallow it. Be patient, lights will come.

Don't worry if he is normal or not. Most WS's don't do normal things. Please stay in Plan A and take care of yourself.

You will have lots of ups and downs, so get ready. But your marriage seems very promising to me. Most WS's do come back. Hang in there.

Sounds normal to me. And so are your reactions. You don't trust him now and don't have any reason too either. Are you on anti-depressants? I got on them 2 wks ago and I think they are helping me. Keeping me calmer, thinking clearer, more able to do plan A, Do you have kids, hobbies, etc to focus on? Do YOU things now. Things that you enjoy or would enjoy but never had time or got the chance to do. God bless you and I will pray for you. For all of us going through this horrible horrible time in our lives.

TANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU!! I just finished dinner for my D and I but I'm not hungry so I thought I would check the board and was I glad I did. you all have put a smile on me and Tnank you for that.I really don't have any hobbies but I thought I would join "curves" and try to slim down a little I have lost 10lbs.,really could use to lose 10 more but at least the exercise would keep me busy.
I went to the doctor on the 10th and he gave me lexipro and something to help me sleep so I don't think they have started working yet.
Oh how I pray that he will want to keep our marriage together.We have been married 22yrs.and I still don't want anyone else.I pray when the fog goes away he feelss the same.
I'm glad to hear it's normal for him to be depressed about what he did.Is the depression a part of the fog also?and where can I read more about "fog"?
O how I wish we had a chat room on here!
KEEP PRAYING FOR ME AND I AM PRAYING FOR YOU!

Usually they are not sorry or depressed. At least they don't admit it to BS. So that is a very good sign. And your H even stood up for you to OW. They usually take OW's side. So it seems very promising to me. Hang in there, we are all in this together.

yeah, my WH stood up for OW. I "deliberately hurt others" when I told her husband. Poor her! I guess my WH cares more about OW than me and his 2 babies.