<BR>H called at 4 and wanted to meet at the park at 4:30, of course I said yes. And, pat me on the back, I did really good. He wasn't very receptive to it though. I just kept thinking "give it time". He wasn't in the best of moods but he leaves town every Sunday night and is usually a b***h all day. I bit my lip several times, though. He pulled in driving OW's car. I wanted to run right into it with my car. But I didn't. I told him I loved him before he left and he hugged me. He brought up his "relationship" and I asked how things were. He said "It's not me and you." and I replied very lovingly "And it will never be like me and you." He grinned. God, WAKE UP!!!! I'm basically throwing myself at him. Just take the bait and get it over with!!!! I did almost throw up before I got there. I was just so nerous. All in all I think it went pretty good. What do you all think???

Good job Mitzi,<BR> I'm pretty sure running into OW car is a big lovebuster so you did great! Lora

Mitzi,<P>Wow your way stronger then me. I probably would of trashed her car :+) <P>It sounds like your H is already missing you adn the family. I knwo how hard it is to not yell and kick and scream some common sence into him. This was the one point I do not agree with on the PLANS. The vicum has to be the "bigger" person all through the recconciliation. Not very fair and when do we get the reward for being so good? Like I said bravo....you did fabulous. BTW how did the kids handle seeing thire dad?<BR>Confusedwife

You did good Mitzi. What a pain in the a$$ to have to see your H in OW's car. That really takes nerve. Someone would probably have to hold me back because I would ram it to death.<P>Anyway...good job with the No Lovebusting. Keep it up! Hopefully, a lightbulb will light up in his head!<P>p.s. Did your H talk to his MIL....have you spoke with your MIL yet on what was said?<p>[This message has been edited by NoTrust (edited January 02, 2000).]

GREAT JOB!!!!!<P>Bestt hing here is that he said their relationship is not yours!!!!! <P>Go girl...!!!!!<P>Roll Me Away<P><P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

That sounds great!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you, just hang in there and keep it up, you did great with the whole car thing, if that was me there wouldn't be enough left to put a key in.<P>Lesa<P>------------------<BR>maybe someday<P>

Go Mitzi, Go Mitzi, Go Mitzi, <P>You did good... <P>Jim

Good Girl, Mitzi. That was PERFECT!!!<P>Keep it up!<P>Lori

Way to go, just remember what they tell me Baby steps.<P>------------------<BR>brownphdt<P>

Mitzi~<BR>I think you did great, especially with the car thing, now here's a new twist to it.<BR>Think about this car thing, why was he driving her car? Is it because his car isn't working or what? Either way, he used HER car to see YOU. Funny, huh? Like why not celebrate on the joke on her?<BR>She thinks she has him yet he uses her car to see you, isn't that powerful thinking?<BR>Good for you! God Bless!

The reason he was driving her car was because he doesn't have one. WE have one car and I have it. I'll tell you though, I did feel like I had been kicked in the teeth. He couldn't see them yesterday because she wouldnt let him use her car. What a b***h!!! <BR>He didn't talk to his mom. He doesn't have the ba**s to face her. (Is he ashamed of something he's done???) I really felt good about the whole meeting though. <BR>Thanks for all of the replies. They've made me feel even better!!!!

BTW the kids did great seeing their dad. The youngest who's 2, had fallen asleep in the car and was a little crabby but other than that it went good for them. My oldest is 10 and having a hard time with this. I'm calling tomorrow to get him some counseling. Also for the middle one he's 7. He's doing ok for now, but he won't talk much about his dad. He's also acting up alot and I thinks it's got somehing to do with all the stress. Who knows but I'd rather be safe than sorry.

Mitzi, <P>Good job! <P>Also good idea about the counseling. I've been taking my kids all along and they have been doing great!!<P>I word of warning. I think comparing your marriage to his relationship could be considered a lovebuster in that you are trying to educate him. I believe Roll Me Away had something about that in one of her posts.<P>My stbx was driving om's car when she picked up my daughter a couple weeks ago. I couldn't get to my sledge hammer in time!<P>------------------<BR>"You can't always get what you want! But if you try real hard,you might just find, you get what you need!"<BR>Mick Jagger<P>

I thought of the comparison after I said it. I kinda cringed. But he grinned. He didn't seem upset. So hopefully that didn't hurt too much. I think it's just too soon. He seems like he's still angry and isn't too willing to talk. I guess I'll see. I'm stillgonna try and pray until I can't do either anymore.

Mitzi,<P>We have to have the patience of Job.<BR>Like it or not we are stuck doing the work.<P>It sounds like he is thinking about what he has done. Try not to push what-so-ever. Our job is to create that safe place for them to return to.<P>The educational LBs are the hardest for me to avoid.<P>Keep up the good work. It will pay off.<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

The educational LB's are hard for me too. I've always been responsible for everything here except earning the money. I guess I was bossy but that was what he wanted at the time. Maybe it just got old for him. (I don't mean *****y bossy, I just reminded him of everything, almost like a mom.) I WILL learn not to do that anymore. He's a big boy and has to be responsible for himself.