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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
Gee I forget who said that on here, but it happened to me. The last couple of weeks I realized that I have really changed.
I started out here so hurt and hateful. I never posted to WS's, because I couldn't stand any of them.
I went berzerk when I first found out, threw out WH, snooped, was obsessed, swore and screamed at him. For Christmas I threw all of the presents out in the street.
Now I am listening and taking advice from a WS (lostbird). Last night I used the advice to talk to my WH. He had an opportunity to retire, which he has longed for. I told my WH that I no longer want to hurt him or OW.
I feel a spirit of joy and peace. My WH is going to see if his work will give him another chance to retire. So believe that sticking to this board will really change you for the better.
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,925
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,925 |
Believer, I am so glad for your inner change. I read some corresponce between you and LB. I am going to read it from the beginning and post to him too. I really want to change myself too. But I don't know what kind. I think that I am more loving now, less anger. But WH thought I am pretending.
I just arrived home. Wh was here made lunch for S. He left some chicken noodle soup, I ate them. I didn't sse him. He also took out the trash from my bathroom. Should I call or e-mail him to thank him?
I also really want to talk to him. I need to resolve the moving problem. Earlier, I called him, I told him that we both are adults, we have to come up with an agreement how things will work. If he decides to move out, i will give him the Plan B letter. I am not sure he is still seeing OW. He sounded so depressed.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
lostnhurt -
Glad to hear from you. I am in a state of shock. I took lostbirds advice, and now WH is retiring. I just talked to him. He went in this morning and asked for another chance. They made an exception for him, and he signed the papers.
So I feel very good, but also realize that this is not the best thing for me. I have papers at the lawyer to file for divorce. It would be better for me if WH was still working.
But, I have been praying about this. Last night lostbird suggested that I talk about WH's retirement and all of the plans we had. Well that worked. My WH completely changed his mind. Now he will be retiring. I just can't believe that everything has changed so much in the last 24 hours.
However I do have peace and joy. I feel like I have been a helpmate to WH.
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,925
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,925 |
I am so glad the result turned out the way it should be. Do you really want a D? I thought you changed your mind. I think I should hook up with lost bird for his advice how to talk to WH too.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069 |
lostnhurt -
I married my H and took the vows. I have never wanted a divorce. However because of financial reasons, the D papers are with my lawyer. I pretty much accepted that we would get a divorce.
However I have changed. Since being here I am a different person. I still love my WH, no matter what choices he has made. I do not want him to have a terrible life.
You know I am a believer. I have been praying steadily. I think that lostbird's advice was an answer to my prayers. Mainly because his advice worked so fast.
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,925
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Joined: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,925 |
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 549
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Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 549 |
believer... you have changed so much...it is a joy to watch someone make such changes actually <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> ... but you left out my favorite story, the grace and dignity of the knock on the door and calm announcement to WH... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" /> you have helped so many others too...keep up your good work here and elsewhere <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ...awed
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 47
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Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 47 |
Believer, weither you know it or not you have been a great help to me. I don`t post much just read alot. So I had to just tell you that one time while I`m here.
The change od the BS is the best and only good part of a A. It truly is a life changing event.
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