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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,193
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Member
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,193 |
I am in a real spot here. I am the one who had an EA that has ended. It ended a month before my wife and I split up. I thought we had been making some progress but now am not so sure. ( read my post healing from sexual abuse and that will fill you in a bit )
But how could I approach a plan B? For my own good I feel its coem to the point this is what I have to do. I cant be a yo yo for my wife anymore
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 10,107 |
John
I read your referred thread. What a mess. It s a testament to the resilence of the human spirit that your W and yourself are still sane.
It seems insignificant to comment on MB plans in voiew of that painful history BUT I would say that it is usually the BS who implement plan A to help stop the affair and build and attractive and welcoming place for the withdrawing BS to return to.
Plan A rebuilds and offers the attractive spouse/refuge and then if the affair doesn't end plan B removes all access to this warm place from the WS to make them realize what they would be losing by continuing the A.
A good plan A is an absolute prerequisite to an effective plan B.
May I suggest you post this Q on the "general questions II" board as well so the MB wise heads can offer you their support ?
All blessings
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Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,193
Member
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Member
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,193 |
I think I was looking at this wrong. To avoid LB's I am putting myself in plan B. I just seem to push way to hard for us to get back togeather. I need to give her time to deal with the abuse inher past. If I keep pushing I am going to lose her.
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