Hello,<P>Since the phone call from OW about the wrestlers coming here to beat H up..nothing seems to be getting any better. H has been calling me all day from his cell phone at work. He is telling me now I'm making it worse becaue I'm believeing her. I have to believe her some. I have no love or trust for her like he does. She is proving to him that she is evil. It certainly is a fatal attraction. She is now saying she never wanted him (to mutual friends). If that is true then why she pissed off? Why stay just long enough to have relations with him and make him leave me? Why stay long enough to ruin a family? H still acts like he wants to protect this sweet inncent girl....after all the sweetie pie can't do any wrong and Me the bitter wife seems to do everything wrong. H doesn't want me to call the police or the news. Say it will only harm us more. I'm not allowed now to be scared? I'm not allowed to be angry? I'm not allowed to talk to him too much because its throwing it in his face?? I have a awful lot of rules to save others thire feelings. Nobody ever thinks of ME. I see this hurting us more but i can no longer stop my hurt from flowing. I'm bitter and sick to death of this OW always being better and more angelic...shes a B8TCH and a home wrecker..yet i should never say a bad thin g about her. <BR>confusedwife who is about to end it all. perhaps I should think of MY feelings for once?????

HI cw, Whew, pretty good vent you have going. <BR>Done? If you are still angry, keep going. If you are done, then catch you breathe, slow down and think! Anger is good, another emotion jut like sadness, joy, etc. We all have it, but as we let it out, there seems to be more room in our hearts. Room for love to move in and keep you warm.<BR>Your h....interesting man. I am not real clear who he is protecting. Himself is my first thought. He is a little late for that, but he is getting back on track, so be sure to give him credit where it is due. <BR>CW, I see that you feel he is protecting her, but stand back and look at it from another perspective. That may not be the motive. You need to give him some trust so he can prove his love to you. Listen to what he is saying. You have NO reason to trust her or listen to her.<BR>I think maybe both of you are being a tad stubborn? I say give the guy the benefit of the doubt, and if he screws that up, then you will have a better idea what you are dealing with. A chronic liar or someone that made a huge mistake but really is trying to get it together? Which one??<BR>I do think calling the police and news is pretty wild. I understand your concern and safety issues, but do not see where either would be useful. The police are not deterrants-they come in after the fact and punish. That is their role, no disrespect intended. Try to take care of your own safety issues within your family. I can see being quite miffed that h's behavior has put you in this position, and it may well all be nonsense on her part, but remain careful and alert please. You can protect yourself in a variety of ways; cell phone handy, pepper spray, dog, stun gun, etc. <BR>Utobem, why are you blaming your wife and telling her she is making things worse? Many of us on here have heard that line, and it sure does not help the situtation one bit. YOu asked what to do? Maybe you could stop appearing to stick up for the ow, stop blaming your w, be responsible and loving! There is some sort of behavior that you are showing to cw that is causing her to feel less than important. Can you find and stop it?

<BR>I understand your concern for your safety. But I don't think OW will do anything(Opinion). Now that she knows that your H chose you, it seems as if that she's just trying to get under your skin. And as she gets under your skin, she knows that it will make things more difficult for you and your H to reconcile. Try to concentrate on you and Him. Try not to bring up any conversattion about OW. Ignore her. She is being childish. I agree with cl, I think calling the police and news is a little wild. Speaking from an Officer's perspective, the only thing that they can advise you is to get a restraining order on the woman so if she comes on your proprty or to your work, ect... that she'd get arrested. However at this point there is not much they could do. And like I said, she sounds very childish. I know the trust you have in your husband is slim to none, but take it one day at a time. Things will get better. Your in my prayers!