I know that some of you are aware of the "less posted" details of our (Nicole and I) marriage. It is to those of you who are e-mailing Nicole, that I am making this request. Please don't let my actions stop you from doing this. I know that it has been very valuable to her, and has helped her to deal with the rough times. If you guys want to flame me, or not post replies, that's understandable. I just want her to be able to freely say to you guys what she feels, without getting any remarks from me. She has made a change to her password, and I have no more access to her address. I am not going to promise that there will never come a time where she won't let me see a letter, but she will ask any of you before doing this. I don't want to be the reason that she doesn't get the support that she needs and wants. Please keep it up. Dazed, New_, soulloss, you guys too..please.<P>Arik

Arik,<P>Very noble of you...<BR>Showing some respect for her is bery good...<BR>You already know you can trust her... she's never let you down... when it counted!<P>and...<BR>yes... we still love you... <P>Jim

Arik - I'm proud of you. That's a very mature and respectful thing to say. <P>BTW,you know me, if I write to Nicole, there's nothing I'd say that I'd mind your reading!!! Hey, don't forget, if YOU need someone to talk to, we all care very much about YOU, too! <P>Work hard, ok? <P>Lori

Arik, <P>Same for me, there is nothing I would say to Nicole that you could not read.<P>OK...maybe somethings you would not agree with in your present state of mind (because your situation is still in the early stages), but I want to be constructive, never destructive.<P>If it hadn't been for this board, as the betrayed, I don't know what I would have done. It was my support structure. <P>Take care, Arik...there's a lot on the line and you are in control of your family's future. Take the helm and sail them to a safe harbor.<P>------------------<BR>Faith, Hope, Love Remain,<BR>but the greatest of these is Love.<BR>1 Corinthians 13:13<p>[This message has been edited by Faith Hope Love (edited January 11, 2000).]

I'm not one of those in the 'know'- well not totally anyway. Dylan is part of a few email circles, but the board alone is almost more than I can handle sometimes (if you know what I mean). In anycase I was pretty happy to read your post- that's showing some respect and it's a very good place to start.<BR>I'd like to echo Lostva and Faith and say that if you ever need and ear (or a pair of eyes connected to a brain) my email is **edit**.<BR>Dylan seems to think we have a lot in common (tattos, martial arts, um, then of course there's always the obvious). <BR>I'm serious about this, by the way- it's not an empty offer, and I can promise that whatever you write will remain private and confidential.<BR>Deut

Arik -- You are really growing, man. I'm happy for you and Nicole will be pleased with you. I have also e-mailed Nicole in the past, but I would love to converse with you. It really is theraputic and you can say things that you might not want posted for all the world to see. Think about it.

Um....Arik?<P>I'm not in touch with Nicole. No particular reason; just that my input hasn't been requested.<P>Indeed, I believe I should stay out of this one. I'm glad that others such as FHL are involved, however. They have more to offer the situation than I do.<P>However, one suggestion? Why not direct some of these warm fuzzies you're directing at us boardies to your wife?

Arik~<BR>I'm not one of those e-mail friends but I do want to say "ATTA BOY!" I am proud of you facing the truth and taking things in hand better than before! God Bless!<P>------------------<BR>Chick's <BR>Bren<P>You won't see things until your ready to not be blind!<P>

Arik, what a great step in the right direction you have made. I am glad you understand the need to have someone to talk to, remember it's open to you also. I think you both will make it, there's just allot of pain to heal from. This was a great place for you to start. Thanks.<BR>Viki

It would never occur to me to stop supporting a friend, or to 'not be there' for someone...<P>not even due to your actions Arik......and those sure are some actions....(re: the less-posted details)<P>I for one, will be around for Nicole whenever and for however long she needs it.....<P>she is such an inspiration and a source of awe for me...<P>I have been awed by so few human beings lately...<P>I cherish her just for being on the same planet as me...<P>what a great human being...and that is more important than being a great wife or mother...<P>Nicole is a great human being....<P>do you hear me?<P>now excuse me, I have some e-mail to write....<P>dylan<P>------------------<BR>so maybe you wanted a martyr....just a regular gal would'nt do..but baby, I can't hang upon no lover's cross for you...Jim Croce<p>[This message has been edited by soulloss (edited January 11, 2000).]

I will be there for Nicole (and you, Arik) as long as I can handle it... frankly, this is all a bit heady for me right now. <P>I'm not gonna pretend like you don't piss me off royally Arik, and I tell you to your face when you do... but I still care, and believe it or not, understand *some* of your actions, especially when it comes to pulling away from OP and withdrawing. However, of the less-posted stuff... Arik... be very careful, because a person can only take so much hurt and pain. <P> <P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>Nobody knows what you want except you, and nobody will be as sorry as you if you don't get it. ~Barry Manilow

ooooooooohhhhhh.....Sheryl......<P>you go girl....<P>\\\\\ However, of the less-posted stuff... Arik... be very careful, because a person can only take so much hurt and pain \\\\\\ <P><BR>such a good point....every camel has their particular straw and that nasty back problem.......<P>not to say Nicole is a camel...my gosh..the trouble my mouth gets me in......<P>Dylan<BR><P>------------------<BR>so maybe you wanted a martyr....just a regular gal would'nt do..but baby, I can't hang upon no lover's cross for you...Jim Croce