Just so you guys know. I HAVE NO CLUE HOW THIS LETTER CAME OVER HERE. Last I heard was that Scotty told me that the damned dilithium crystals were ready to blow up.<P>Here it goes. I am going to the dentist this Thursday. No big news. BUT Val works at the office that I go to. I have had problems as to what direction I should follow regarding the marriage. Try vs see ya bye.<P>This letter accompanies a card asking for a last chance for the marriage. It carries my true feelings.<P>My Dearest Valerie, ...Bunches... Remember?<P> I was a rotten husband to you. I treated you terribly ,yes, worse than ****! Early in our<BR>relationship there was physical and mental abuse. I was a monster to you. I never ever meant<BR>to hurt you. I am so angry with myself. I was very sick with a chemical imbalance in my brain<BR>because of the years of alcohol abuse. This has all changed now for the better. I am on<BR>medication and have been “dry“ for quite some time and feeling much healthier.<P> I am not interested in starting a relationship with someone new because I think our marriage<BR>is still worth saving and THERE is still love between us. I miss you terribly. I miss seeing you<BR>first thing in the morning and last at night. I miss holding you like spoons while we sleep. I<BR>miss hearing your sweet voice everyday. I miss your touch. I miss your smell. I miss your<BR>love. I miss everything about you.<P> I have learned allot about myself in the last 10 months. I have made great advances in<BR>personal development. I now know how to be a GREAT husband and would like to show you<BR>what I can do to make you feel so loved, wanted and needed. <P> You say that you love me, but are not “in love” with me. You fell “in love” with me once and I<BR>believe that you will find the “new and improved” Tim even better and will fall “in love” with me<BR>again. A relationship is ever changing I have so much love and attention to offer you that our<BR>marriage with only grow and flourish. You can not imagine the deep love that I have found for<BR>you. I have no doubt that with just a little time invested you could be so very happy with me.<P> You say that things happen for a reason. Here is my take on the situation. This was a wake<BR>up call for ME. I finally broke down and went to see the doctor. I found out what the alcohol<BR>abuse was doing to my mind. I was put on medication. I woke up and discovered who I would<BR>be losing if my behavior continued. Meeting YOU and marrying YOU were the absolute best<BR>things that ever happened to me. You could not have been any nicer or kinder to me through<BR>out the years. I can remember all the “little” things that you did for me. You would surprise me<BR>with your sweet gestures. You went out of your way to please me and I did little in return. I<BR>have changed for the better. You will NOT be disappointed!<P> I can see the love that you still have for me in your eyes. I can hear it in your voice. I can<BR>feel it when we are together. I sense it when I touch you. It is buried behind a thick wall<BR>because you are afraid to admit it and commit once again to a relationship that was rocky at<BR>best. This was in the past. I can not do anything to change that. I can change the present and<BR>future and treat you as I should have all along. You were the perfect wife. I don’t want to get<BR>hurt again. You don’t want to get hurt again. I DO NOT want to hurt you again. I never meant<BR>to ever hurt you. I can never say that “I’m sorry” to you enough for what I have done to you.<P> I am the one that you love. I am the one that you married. I am the one that let you down by<BR>years of abuse and neglect. I was the one that filed for divorce. I do not deny any of it. I WILL<BR>NOT sign the final papers until I am sure in my mind that we have tried every last option to<BR>salvage the relationship. I am the one that can bring the most change into this relationship and<BR>make it work. I only ask that you give me, us one last chance before we throw it all away.<P> I truly love you with all my heart and soul. I swear to God that I will never let you down<BR>again. I love you more than life itself.<P>Well, that's it. It represents the last 11 years of my life and how I feel with the relationship with her.<P>This letter has not been sent. I will hand deliver it on Thursday.<P>Looking for YOUR imput.<P>Tim<P>I bet I will never ever be able to paste a message again.

A: how'd you paste that... hahahahaha <P>B: I LOVE your letter! God, how I wish David would write one like that to me! In a lot of ways I've always felt like Val... <P>You done good, Tim... <B>very good</B>.<P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>Nobody knows what you want except you, and nobody will be as sorry as you if you don't get it. ~Barry Manilow

Tim,<P>All I can tell you is this:<P>I would give $1 million to get a letter life that from my H!!!!!!<P>You owe it to yourself to give this one more shot if she is willing, and it certainly sounds like she is willing. I can see that changes for the better in you, Tim, so they certainly can not have escaped dear Val's notice, either. <P>I am praying that she will accept your offer to REALLY work on the marriage - I know how much you love her and are commited to her.<P>This is very touching, Tim...the serious side we seldom see! <P>Desiree<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

Hey Zippy,<P>All I can say is, if I were Val, I'd be home with you right now!!<P>I swear, these letters are really getting to me. That was amazing, and touching and just pretty damn romantic.<P>Tim, you have to give that to her. You have to hand deliver it to her!<P>Oh, it's beautiful.<P>Cheryl

Tim,<P>One more thought...how about a single rose to go with the hand-delivered letter????????<P>Good night all!<P>Desiree<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

one correction...<P>well, Sheba and K aren't here to do it....<P>you knew it was coming....<P>"I swear to God that I will do my UTMOST to NEVER let you down again"<P>no absolutes, Tim.....you may let her down, she may find it forgivable, it may be a small thing...but promising to do your utmost is believable whereas absolutes are not...<P>in all seriousness......quiet Sheryl...I promise not to write a book here.....you love her, the references you repeatedly make to spooning in many of your posts....make me cry.....what I have seen and read of you....your sense of humour, your joy, your sadness and confusion where she is concerned....this all stems from such a good place within you...you are really quite remarkable and I hope someday she see's what she has in you not just what you have in her.<P>Dylan<P>see Sheryl.....kept it short...lol<P>

I must be known as the "short and sweet" one because both you, soulloss, and lostva both say you're sorry to me before you post your epistles!!<P>If you want to write a book, fine, just keep warning me first, before I get my glasses, coffee, slippers,... sleeping pill Nah, just joshin'<P>Love you guys... and again Tim... I LOVED your letter!!! <P>Dare I say even the part where you swore to god... <P>------------------<BR>~Sheryl<P>Nobody knows what you want except you, and nobody will be as sorry as you if you don't get it. ~Barry Manilow

Let me give you my STBX's e-mail address at work and maybe you can give him an example of a letter I would love to get from him. I would do anything to get one of those. She is really one lucky woman to have a H that loves her so much and is willing to work with her no matter the time or cost. <BR>Nancy<P>Are you sure I can't talk you into e-mailing it to my H

Tim,<P>I was begining to worry. I thought you might have given up on your vigile.<P>This is the fourth letter I've read tonight, two of the others I was convinced should not be given to the person they were intended for. I gave my honest un sugar coated opinion. So here goes...<P>From whar I could tell you were able to put your feelings to paper w/out including a bunch of major lovebusters. That is the most important thing to remember.<P>My question to you is this...Has Val said or done anything specific that leads you to believe she is concidering reconciliation?<P>From all that you've stated here you and Val have been enjoying each others company.<P>Last week when you were unsure of your feelings, I sent you a note with saying I had some ideas.<P>Here goes...As many have noticed I have become a disiple of the Harley philosophies. Of everthing I have read the past three months they make the most sence. So I would suggest what they believe. <P>Do the policy of joint agreement. Than impliment the four rules of a successful marriage. It is that simple. Oh and I forgot meet each others most important emotional needs.<P>You have really put it all out there in this letter. Try to keep your expectations low...not easy!<P>I have faith in your plan-medic, so far it has yielded dramatic results. If this doesn't win her over right away, continue with your plan-medic. She will see the new you for sure.<P>...Is Val a hygenist or an assistant?<P>If they're not happy w/there lab, I can make some damn nice crowns...sorry didn't mean to hawk buisness on your thread.<P>Enjoy you trip to the Dentist<P><BR>Bill<P><P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Tim, I am the least capable to make any suggestions tonight, but I am glad you haven't given up on Val.<P>Alex<P>------------------<BR>Live and learn<BR><p>[This message has been edited by ThisAlex (edited January 12, 2000).]

Go for it!! I think it's time.<P>Lori

Hey Tim- there must be an epedemic going on here, it seems like everyone is writing letters that they dont know wether to give or not.<BR>It was a good letter, and I could identify with alotr of the behaviors. I was emotionally/mentally abusive to Heidi in our marriage and alot of that had to do with ME and not her ( how do you guys make the letters bold?) . So I relate.<P>I aint giving her that letter yet. Maybe someday. All I know is after posting that, I felt so much better about myself and the future - hopefully with her.<P>I wish I would have posted more here, instead of doing the begging, pleading, anger, stuff.<P>

Absolutely beautiful and heartfelt.I am sitting here with tears rolling down my cheeks.If that doesn't pull a few heart strings,I don't know what will!! <P>------------------<BR>~~~~~Tammy~~~~~<P>If you love something set it free.If it comes back it is yours.If it doesn't it was never meant to be.<BR>

Tim...<BR>All I can say is WOW! The letter is wonderful. One day I hope my H will feel the same way about me...<P>------------------<BR>Jaded Heart<BR>____________<P> <A HREF="http://journeys.webprovider.com" TARGET=_blank>http://reflect.to/journeys</A> <P> <P>

Sure is a long way from pounding sand huh bud? hehe Glad to see you're making headway.<P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.<P><BR>

Me again!,<P>Hey Sheryl,<P>I have no idea how I got the letter over here. I tried what you suggested. I tried what Dylan suggested. It didn't work. I really must be dumb as dirt. Then I tried a combination of both. Not really sure what buttons or thingies I clicked but I got it here.<P>I took a good hard look at myself and my situation. These are my true feelings put down on paper. This wasn't easy for me.<P><BR>Hey Desiree,<P>After digging through alot of memories and feelings I have found that she is the absolute best thing that ever happened to me. Just took me a while to figure that out. So I took the short bus to school.<P>I'm sure that you probably haven't noticed, but, I hide behind humor rather than face my emotions head on. Less painful.<P>You know what's funny. I dropped off some single roses at her office in the past and just this past year found out she loves the yellow ones. We were together 11 years and I just find this out. Can you say really poor communication skills?<P><BR>Hi Cee Cee,<P>I think after 39 years I am finally joining the living. It took me some time to find my heart and look inside. Silly me, It was in a pocket in my dress pants in the closet. Thanks.<P><BR>Dylan,<P>I thank you for your imput and will change the sentence. I would do almost anything for her if she would return. It took me a bit to figure out that I really do love her more than life and that I want to work on the marriage.<P>I find myself grabbing her pillow at night and hugging it as I would have if she were here.<P>My son and I were at a local hospital after a call and one of the nurses asked how Val is doing because she hasn't seen her with me for a while. You guys were the perfect couple. Boy, that was uncomfy.<P><BR>Hey Nancy,<P>This isn't anything special. It is just a written version of what I have found to be my true feelings for the woman that I asked to be my wife.<P>I was a total idiot for the longest time. I think that they should give newlyweds Dr H's books as a prerequisite.<P><BR>Hey Bill,<P>No, not ready with the white divorce flag yet. I was in a very strange place for a while. Not sure which way was up.<P>Val has made many comments that lead me to believe that she does not want to divorce. She tells me "that would be best". [the divorce] Then in another sentence she makes reference to you can call me and we can do something, I like to hear from you. Poor example I know, but , believe me she really doesn't want to ditch me.<P>Val scoffs at Dr H's principles saying they are dumb. They are really simple down to earth common sense ideas for people who care about one another. Well, That's another day.<P>She is an assistant. I get all my dental work for the cost of outside lab work. I had a crown put in last year and it was only $85 for the cap. Normally goes for $500 or so. That's why I am going for a cleaning tomorrow. Another freeby while I'm still married to an employee of the practice. <P><BR>Hey Alex,<P>Thanks for your concern. This sucks worst than life itself sometimes, doesn't it?<P>Take care Buddy.<P><BR>Hi Lori,<P>I'm going to give her the card with letter inside and the yellow rose on my arrival at the office. Cleaning usually takes an hour. That should give her ample time to read it. 2000 is going to be my year, come hell or high water.<P><BR>Hi Cov,<P>I just wasn't ready to be a good H. Now after finding this site and all you guys I have made some very significant self improvements. I feel that I could take on the world.<P>Hang out with us. You will not find a better bunch of caring people ever.<P><BR>Tammy,<P>Thanks. You are so lucky. My son and I were going to do a 3 day trip down to Va Beach this week and look you up and stay with ya. Unfortunately one of my guys had a seizure and is in the hospital. I have to cover his shifts. That kind of cancelled our plans.<P><BR>Hello Jaded,<P>Thanks. After a lot of soul searching this is what I came up with. No BS or MSG. Yes, I want her. Yes, I need her. Yes, I love her.<P>Thanks to all. What does Blutto say?<BR><P>------------------<BR>"It's not over till we say it's over! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? H*ll no!" Blutto...Animal House 1984<P>Wishing us all the Best.<P>Medic<P>

It's a pretty good letter. However, a few suggestions.<P><B>You will NOT be disappointed!<P>I can see the love that you still have for me in your eyes. I can hear it in your voice. I can feel it when we are together. I sense it when I touch you. It is buried behind a thick wall because you are afraid to admit it and commit once again to a relationship that was rocky at best.<P>I am the one that you love</B><BR>Don't tell her how or what she is/will feel.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

Hey Paul,<P>Long time, no hear. I hope things are going well for you. No sand here! We, my son and I, were planning on going down to Va Beach for a few days before he goes back to college. It obviously wouldn't be to hang out on the beach, but, there are so many places to see and visit there. I have a facination with that area. Don't know why. That's where I will retire in the next few years.<P><BR>Hey Chris,<P>I'll give on the "disappointed" and "the one you love" line. She did tell me she still loves me. Good call.<P>The paragraph where I speak of the love that I feel she still has for me is from my perpective. I am simply stating that I can see and feel the emotions that she willing or unwillingly showing to me. <P>Take care, Thanks for your imput.<P>Tim<BR>

Great letter and I think it'll work. <P>Quick question: This Lucky Love Letter is handwritten on quality cotton-blend paper and inside a foil-lined envelope? Yes? <P>May I suggest you use a spritz of your new cologne to wet the glue when you seal it.<BR>It's those little things that chicks dig...<P>Good luck!