Cindy has left me and has been living away for 2 weeks now. She hasn't asked for a divorce but she says that she feels like she and the OM will be together whether now or 2 years down the road. I came close to suicide, the only thing that stopped me was she came to check her mail. I thought that I was going to bleed to death. Now I am afraid to be alone. I have an appointment with a doctor tomorrow at which point I expect to be put on a strong med if not committed somewhere. She says that she still loves me, but not romantically. The other guy is supposedly out of the picture until we *end* our relationship. Cindy says that she doesn't want to have a negative memory for the two of them to start their relationship together. I feel that whether it is now or a year from now, how can she deny that the OM is the cause of our marriage ending. If any of you have gone through this to this degree, please help me. I don't know how much longer I can hold on.

Dale,<P>you did the right thing in making an appointment to see a Dr. that is the first <BR>step of putting yourself first for a change, <BR>you need to take care of yourself before you can think of caring for others, remember love hurts sometimes or it wouldn't be love.<P>I don't know how old you are or what type of support group you have around you but you need to utilize your family and friends, don't let the shame or embarrassment she may<BR>have brought you,cause to you hurt yourself<BR>I am sure you are loved by many and they are<BR>the ones you need to lean on.<P>Praying you will, let God carry you through.<BR>Nita

Dale,<BR>Please hang in there util tomorrow. If you don't think you can go to a hospital now!! It's not hopeless. There are several people here who are in the recovery process and rebuilding their marriages. Please keep posting here and venting. It really will help. Don't just sit and give up. You can and will be OK! Take care<P>

Dale,<P>Don't wait for tomorrow...<BR>Go to the emergency room now...<P>If you can't get there now...<BR><B>TRY TO GO TO A FAMILY OR FRIEND'S HOUSE</B>!... tonight at least!<P>There are many here... who have entertained this most awful of thoughts... some have even actually attempted it... Don't join them. Being alone tonight is <B>not</B> the place to be.<P>Things look bleak now...<BR>If need be... keep posting non-stop today...<BR>Start a new post everytime if you need it...<BR>This is serious...<P>But...<BR>know <B>we</B> are here too!!! <BR>Love doesn't seem to be there...<BR>Let it come from us...<P><B>We</B> all love you... <BR>We've been there buddy...<P>Jim

Oh let's see.<BR>25 Dec 98 found out my Wife had an affair 10 years ago.<BR>26 Dec 98 found out she just finished an affair with someone.<BR>4 Jan 99 dicovered my Mom has Alzheimers.<BR>21 Jan 99 13 year old daughter blows .104 BAC & gets arrested for underage drinking.<BR>1 Feb 99 Wife goes on 1 week vacation<BR>9 Feb 99 Comes back & says she is leaving to "find her space."<BR>17 Feb 99 She moves across the country<BR>Early March 99 Find out she's living with wankboy.<P>To this day she claims "he has nothing to do with it."<P>Ya! As if! She left me & the girls because "I was terrible & he has nothing to do with it?"<BR>Sure I felt like doing myself in a few times. Sorta hate to say it, but it does get better. Hang on Dale.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

Dale,<P>First thing I want to discuss with you is the suicide attempt. Never do that again !<P>My first h killed himself, hung himself to be exact. Was I sorry for thye pain I had caused him in our marriage ? Yes, and the guilt was overwhelming for a couple of years. Did my life end with his, NO.<P>I remarried a year later, I have been married for 21 years now. I have a son who is 19, and despite what brought me to this board love my 2nd h with all my heart (well on most days anyway). What does my 1st h have? Nothing , he left no children, had no siblings, there is nothing left. If we had wound up divorced, he could have remarried and had a family and maybe have been happy.<P>Just know if you decide to take your life it won't do anything but end a life that God gave you for a reason. When you have finished your job here, God will take you home on His own, He doesn't need your help with that, ok?<P>And don't give up quite yet, at one point my h and I (the h I have now) were seperated for 1 & 1/2 years while he lived with another<BR>woman. And I had to see them together alot, because of our son. I wanted to die, I really did. But if I had when ow left h for his best friend, I wouldn't have been around for us to get back together. So don't give up.<P>I wish I was one of the really wise people we have around here, but maybe one will be along soon.<P>I will be praying for you Dale.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

All right Dale, check in time.<P>Where are you ? How are you ?<P>Please let us hear from you.<P>------------------<BR>Just call me - Deb<BR>------------------------<BR>The only day I can do anything about is today, yesterday is gone, tomorrow is not yet mine.<P>

Dale, where are you? We've all been there, buddy. Just hop in here for a minute and let us know how you are.<P>Lori

Dale, you aren't alone. My H moved out 5 months ago. He lived with the OW for about a month. He told me he didn't love me, he regretted marring me, etc. etc. Your W is going to say things that hurt you, make no sense. She is confused (like your not, I know). She is probably not thinking. Read the info. on the site, try using it. But please what ever you do, don't hurt yourself. Life is too precious. <P>------------------<BR>Lots of love,<BR>Viki

Hi Everybody,<BR> Thanks for the messages, they really helped. Cindy went to see the OM last night and she says that her feelings for him won't change. However, she still wants to see me (nothing physical, because she isn't in love with me or attracted to me anymore). I'm supposed to go with her to Atlanta this weekend. I hope maybe in another environment that she might have flashbacks of all the fun we had. Once again, thanks for caring.