A couple of people have suggested that anti-depressants may help. I would really like to know if any of you have tried them and if they have helped. Right now, the thought of the OW, and the pictures in my mind of H & OW together is becoming overwhelming. It almost seems to becoming an obsesion, it's all I think about. The thing that bothers me about anti-depressants, is that H has suggested them, because I am sad & crying a lot. Well DUH!!, I just kind of took offense that he kind of is blaming my mood on being depressed and needing medication, not that there is a very good reason for feeling this way. Almost compares to someone saying "must be your time of the month" not that there is a legit. reason for your feelings. Maybe I just took it wrong. Anyway, I was just wondering what experiences you all have had with medication.<BR>Thanks for everything

Crying, yes I think they do I myself am on Prozac I know I would be a wreck with out it. At first it keep me awake then all I wanted to do was sleep then in a few weeks when every thing was back in balance I felt sooo much better. And was able to get focused on things.<BR>any way I hope this helps a bit.<BR>Lesa<P>------------------<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> LMS20ish@cs.com <P><BR>

I have been on Zoloft for the past year and 4 months. I don't think I would have survived without it. . . but you should talk to your doctor and see if antideps are right for you (you may need anti-anxiety med for a while; that's what my H took). As they say, it doesn't hurt to ask. FYI, I was the one who had an affair and spent a year working to regain my marriage, only to have my husband die last October in an accident. So yeah, with all I've been through, I can say I'm the antidep poster child, and grateful for the help. Just because your H suggests it doesn't mean it's a bad thing. He probably does want to help you feel better if he is truly remorseful for the affair. . . <P>Just MHO.

Don't let the fact that your h. suggested the antidepressant keep you from seeking help. I for one would never had made it through this ordeal without my meds (wellbutrin). Antidepressants take the edge off and help to clear your head a little. I'm not going to tell you that they will take away the pictures in your head - unfortunately not - but you won't feel soooooooo sad and overwhelmed ALL the time. I too felt like the pictures were consuming me. The crying and sadness are totally to be expected - it sucks I know - but you should definitely see your doctor and get started on something - it usually takes a couple of weeks for the meds to kick in so the sooner you start, the sooner you can start feeling a little like your old self again. Don't feel ashamed...hey you don't even have to tell your h. you're taking it if you're worried about him having the "power".<BR> Also, sometimes the first med you try isn't the best for you - you may need to experiment - prozac didn't do much for me but wellbutrin has been a lifesaver. Like so many others who have posted, I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't been on it when all this came about.<BR>Talk to your doctor, let him/her know what's going on. He/she will probably be more than happy to help you out. This is a time when you need all the help you can get - why suffer any more than you have to?? You owe it to yourself to do whatever it takes to feel "alive" again.<BR>A p.s. to that would be exercising. I felt it very therapeutic to walk, walk, walk, it really helps to clear your head. It is amazing how down I can feel and how lessened the feeling is after an hour or so of working out. Just a suggestion. Also try to stay off the sugar if you can - I found it triggered "moods"!<BR>Good luck and take care

Crying I&O,<P>I think that antidepressants would be very helpful to you in your situatuon. They worked wonders on me and I like you tended to overthink everything. I too was set off by certain triggers (like seeing a blond) and the meds calmed me in every way. I currently take two, Remron at night and Welbuterin in the morning. I have been on this mix for 8 months and feel so much better. My marriage was not salvagabe, but it has given me the strenght needed to go life on my own. I hope you see a MD quick, cause the sooner the better. Take care of yourself<P>Gerri

Yes - they help. I didn't take them very long, only a few weeks, but that was the FIRST few weeks and, though I still cried, I didn't feel so hopeless. They took the "edge" off so that I could cope and think until I was able to handle it w/out them.<P>Definitely, check into it. This is NOT a walk in the park or even a bad day. This shakes you to your very soul. You do what needs to be done to take care of you - that's the best way to take care of your marriage!!<P>Lori

I didn't take any form of anti-dressants. Maybe I needed them, but for me it was something I didn't want to do. If you are crying because he had an affair and he doesn't think that there is anything to be upset about then maybe he should go to the doctor!! I really think that some counseling would help you and your marriage. If not couple counseling then at least for yourself. I would try counseling before I try any meds. Just my two cents worth. I still have bad times and sometimes it feels like I am on a rollercoaster that will not stop, but things are really getting better. The pictures in your mind will go away with time, I don't think any meds will make that disapear. Monique