I'm scared. This whole week has been so peaceful and safe...I've dealt with the guilt and devastation that I've caused my H. I prayed a lot. Read my Bible. The OM has been away all week. (He's a world traveler), and I know he will try to contact me as soon as he gets back. (tonight). I need strength to resist. I am afraid of getting sucked back into his web. I have been so thankful for this week. I not only found this website, but I realized that having absolutely NO contact with the OM is the ONLY way for me to recover. I used to try to fool myself and 'end it, but still being friends,' but that is a cop-out. It is a way of still hanging on. This week has been so good. I just am afraid, because I have to tell him (OM) that it is REALLY OVER. He won't believe me, because I have said that a lot in the past. I have had him in my life for almost a 2 yrs. and am afraid of the withdrawal. But I think I can make it, I have all of you now. I have God, my husband, and a lot of good friends....HELP ME BE STRONG! THANK YOU!!!!!!! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!!!

Hi Danielle,<P> So glad to hear that you are with your H and want the Om out of your life. Do you have Surviving An Affair? Harley suggests writing a letter to the OM and telling him in no uncertain terms that it is over and you love your H and will be working on your marriage. I think that's alot safer and final than talking to him...Good luck and read all you can about withdrawl....Lu

Thank you Lu, I will get the book!<BR>

I agree with Lu... a NO CONTACT letter can be very very effective... it worked for us. <BR>Deut

Danielle1313,<P>If you can't get the book quickly enough... I can e-mail you a copy that is a draft form of the "no contact" letter... (2 other's asked me for it already... so I have it available)<P>Reach me at imherczeg@yahoo.com .<P>When the OM calls tonight...<BR>Be <B>courteous</B>... be <B>very</B> short... let him know you've thought about the relationship... and that a letter will be coming explaining your decision... <B>then</B>...<P><B>HANG UP THE PHONE.... IMMEDIATELY</B>...<BR>Do <B>NOT</B> continue the conversation more than 30 seconds... 5 seconds is even better!<BR><B>DO NOT PICK UP THE PHONE FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT</B> (or if you can disconnect it... do so!<P><B>NO</B> "How are you?"'s...<BR><B>NO</B> "How was your trip"...<BR><B>NO</B> "I miss you"'s...<BR><B>NO</B> chit-chat!!!<P>This will be one of the hardest calls you'll ever have...<P>Prayers for strength... <P>Jim<p>[This message has been edited by NSR (edited January 18, 2000).]

Danielle,<BR>Be strong, hang in there and dig deep to find the strength to do what you need to do.<P>It's going to be one of the hardest things you've ever done, I will be praying for you.<P>Come back to this site to vent, cry, or scream, or go out tonight with your husband on an impulse trip to the movies or a restaurant or something to keep you away from the phone.