Any advice on this one major issue jeopardizing my marriage would be appreciated. My wife & I have been married for 7 years. We have 2 children a 5 year old boy and a 3 year old girl. Our marriage has had its ups & downs but overall it has been a good relationship but it still needs some work. The big issue for the last year or so has been that my wife wants a 3rd child and I do not. It's not that I don't totaly want a 3rd child, it's just that I'm not ready for one right now. I can't say what the future will bring. I say that we have to work on strengthen our marriage first and then talk about a 3rd child. My wife keeps preasuring me on this, almost daily. She saids, "that I'm playing games and stalling until it's to late and that she resentents me and that she will never forgive me if we don't have a third child." I say that we both have to want a third child, not just one of us. She saids, "That I get everything I want and she gets nothing." I say that this is a life issue that we both have to agree on equally. I've been trying hard to work on our marriage but she keeps preasuring me on this one issue. Am I wrong not to want a third child or is she wrong to keep preasuring me on this?

The hard part is that there isn't "right and wrong" in what you want. The right and wrong comes from the manner in which you treat each other. I would have to agree that having a strong and stable marriage is very important when making a decision to have children.<p>Maybe it's time for some counselling in your marriage? If you talk to your wife and say that you feel that your marriage is not stable enough for another child and that you would consider it if she would agree to counselling and working to strengthen and stabilize the marriage together?<p>terri

I can understand your feelings about a third child. I'm scared to death to have one child. I would ask your wife if you could pray about the decision and ask her if she will just wait a little longer until you decide to conceive again. Don't tell her definate no, never, but tell her to compromise and wait a little. That will give you some time to think about the blessings of your other two kids and be prepared for the next one that may come. I assume she isn't at the end of her chilbearing years and feels that clock ticking.Hope this helps some.