My wife has just discovered internet chatting.While chatting,she likes to have sexually explicit conversation with other men,send and recieve sexually explicit e-mail,and send her photo's(portraits only) to these men.She has intentionally misle these men to believe she is a single woman purely for enjoyment.She keeps this correspondence in the computer under password and refuses to share any details with me.I have informed her that I find this offensive and disrespectful to our marriage but,she refuses to stop.She claims it is only for fun and says I am overreacting.I find it potentially dangerous for her to e-mail her photo to a complete stranger while misleading him to believe she is single and searching.I also correspond through the internet,sometimes with female but,I do not have sexually explicit conversation,send pictures,or hide my correspondences under password.She has complete access to my e-mail and has been informed of this.I am concerned for her safety and well-being because,some of her internet aquaintances know her real name and face.She spends approximately 5-6 hrs a day chatting and our home is a complete mess.Am I wrong?What should I do?<br>

I think the first issue you need to face is that your wife is not respecting your wishes. She is not respecting you. I don't have to tell you that respect is very important in a relationship - you already know that. <p>She thinks you are overreacting which means she is not validating your feelings. I for one believe you have reason to feel upset. More for the fact that she doesn't seem to care about your feelings regarding this issue than for the fact that she is doing what she is doing.<p>Does she disrespect you and make you feel like your feelings are not justified in other situations?<p>I think you need to sit down and have a serious talk with her. Let her know that this has gone on too long, that you feel hurt, and that you are not happy.<p>Don't use threats, but make sure she understands how adamant you are.<p>And no, it is not normal when you are so addicted to something that you let the rest of your life slide. You are justified in your worries.<p>Good luck!<p>

bobby27, altho I don't have this problem, just being in this forum for a few months is proof enough that this isn't an innocent thing. 1) People do get involved with people over the net that turns into affairs, something I myself do not understand.2) She IS not honoring your feelings, and you are not over reacting 3) I have to agree with you it can be dangerous to send her picture over the net when she is sending/talking sex porn (to me it is)4) Suggestion: Does she have some sexual fantasies she would like do to, can she do them with you? I can tell you, I have met some men in person from the net, 2 are friends now, but all men were hoping for a "relationship, sexual and other.<br>I think she isn't thinking about the consequences here regarding her safety. She could also be in an addictive mode. Personaly I find that type thing degrading, but thats me.....something must be turning her on with that. AND, it is true that some people have gotten stalked from the net. Can you sit down and talk with her about this? I was once engaged to a man who loved pornagraphy (spelling) and became distant and uncomunicative, and non sexual. Is this serving an escape from reality? I know from knowing people this can be really addictive. Is she more sexual after these internet "conversations". This may sound bad, but can you get into her temporary files to see what she is doing? I am sorry you have to go thru this, I went thru it with my X, I hated it!!!JADE

I had read some entries about this topic earlier last week & I don't have a problem with porn-type websites. My man & I look together & it can be funny/fun. Corresponding and building intimacy with others is a whole other category. I found out on Friday that my man was in a Couples (Swingers) Club chat room & discussing the possibility of another couple watching us have sex. Then he emailed pictures of us to the couple, then he told me about it two emails later. I was horrified! --Not even so much about them watching us, just that he would be anything but absolutely open with me, especially about something that was going to involve me. Seems like a control thing. Your wife doesn't appear to be hiding the fact that she is doing this, just hiding the details. In my mind, these internet chats are affairs. She is unwilling to discuss this rationally? She is just driven/addicted to the attention. Are the two of you not as emotionally connected as you were before this started?