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#53861 01/24/99 03:15 PM
Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 6
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Vid Offline OP
Junior Member
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Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 6
Please refer to my last post " I'm Losing her ... Why?" <p>I am now Away from my surroundings, In a different counry and weather. I have been here for one day yet I can't let go of her. After speaking with my sister I realize that I must end my relationship in order to move on. I don't mean that I want to break off with my wife or even get divorsed but I need to let her go. You know the line ... If you love someone set them free, ... I haven't been able to let her go. I thought I did but yet as soon as I arrived in florida (where I am staying till next month) I called her right away and tryed to start a conversation. All I really should of done is say I have arrrived and I am fine. And that's all. But I didn't I wanted to talk and she said that she can't be talking to me everyday that this is not why I left. My W and I met for coffee on Friday before i left. We had a long conversation, she started off a little stand offish but soon enough we were actually talking and not blaming. Nothing negitive or positive came out of the conversation. No hope was given and no dreams were shattered. We just talked. She did say that i have been on the right path for change but that I was at a deadlock. I have realized my changes and what I want to accomplish within myself but I haven't done it yet. Running and calling her everyday, asking her what her thoughts on past events are. Really is not letting go or changing. I am asking her to return to a place that she wants to get away from and get past. I am still in my own way trying to control the situation. One of the reasons why she left. after this conversation I left feeling good about the talk. For the first time since the break up I haven't been depressed or down on myself after talking or seeing her. I know now that I must let go. I need to end this control and to really set her free. She needs this and so do I. If I don't let her go she will never come back. And if she doesn't, someone else will come to me. I am a beautiful person with a lot of love to offer. My question is this. What can I do to let go? what must I tell myself? How do I end a relationship for the best interest of the couple? What steps must I take to begin the hardest thing I will do in my life? I love this woman and I know (right now) that I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I must do this for myself in order for her to really return and in order for me to find the right person for me. I understand that maybe she's not the one. But I must start out on this road. How do I yeid<br> right to take the on ramp? <p>Please help. You folks have helped get me this far.

#53862 01/30/99 11:21 PM
Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 6
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Vid Offline OP
Junior Member
OP Offline
Junior Member
V
Joined: Jan 1999
Posts: 6
Please Help me. I've been away for close to 10 days now. But I still can't stop myself from calling her. Each call is worst then the last. I first called her on tuesday to ask her to please leave me one couch. We got into an argument about who takes what and who did what. After this call she went to our bank in rage. she took her name off our joint account and emptied the safety deposit box. She took all the Jewlery (about $5000 not counting the $10000 engaement ring which she stoped wearing) and the marriage certificate. I asked her why she replied with "I was mad."<br>I called to check for my messages last night and heard a strange message from a man I do not know. The message was quite simple just it's late your not there I'll call you tommorow. It drove me nuts. well this morning I called and asked her about the messages she told me I had one, I asked her about this guy and she blew up at me. Funny thing though the conversation went from not knowing her and what she is about to money. A subject that her father has alot to do with. Her father is a cheap [censored] ( excuss my french) he never accepted me and always rass her about having a jiont account. As soon as she was ingaged to me he decided to stop paying for Univerisity, ONly thing is he never mentioned it to us. This is the first time that she is making any money in 7 years. She started talking about how she made 30 thousand this year and has nothing to show for it because I spend money on anything. She goes on by saying that (spending money) is what I needed and that this(taking everthing and leaving me) is what she needs. It's obvious to me that her fathers insights has finnally broken through her walls,(she never listened to him before) and that the law firm where she is articling has another roll in this sitcom. I know that the best thing i can do for us is not call her and just leave her alone. But I JUST CAN'T. please help. If i CONTINUE THIS WAY I WILL LOSE HER FOR EVER, WHAT MUST I DO TO STOP THIS BEHAVIOUR?


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