I have a conflict with my husbands sister. I used to believe it started with our visit to her home about six years ago for christmas. After returning home, her husband called and her mother also to complain to my husband about my children and my behavior. His sisters complaints were trivial, I took too hours to fix my hair every day, I stained a couple of washclothes with my makeup and my children were getting snot all over her furniture (my son 8 mos at the time came down with a cold and ear infection). Petty complaints really. Since that time she has stopped sending birthday cards to myself and the children. I called her personally to question her about her actions after hearing about rumors circulating amont the family about her complaints about the visit. She voiced these complaints and more. When I questioned her about not sending my children cards any longer, she did send them before, she stated her reason was that she did not recieve thank you cards in return. The children were only toddlers at the time. She also concluded the call saying that if she cannot get along with people she doesn't want anything to do with them. I feel that she is creating a diversion because her behavior was not beyond reproach during that visit, she cursed her mother in the presence of 4 other people during christmas dinner preparation. The the climax was a fit she had christmas evening with her storming out of the house and not returning until everyone had gone to bed. The next morning she came upstairs to speak to me and was voicing general complaints, I told her that I did not know her for I had only visited with her about three time before but I thought she was materialistic. This conversation was concluded with me giving her a hug and telling her because we were family, we would try to get along. This had caused many problems for my husband and myself because after recieving the phone calls relaying to him "How dare I jump on his sister in her new home", he did not ask me about what had happened during the visit, he was not aware that I had hugged his sister and made an attempt to get along. He was unfortunately placed in the middle of both of us. We eventually cut off communication with her and her family. This of course upset his mother, and she was being used to force a reconciliation. Any communication from his sister was of an accusing nature. When she was aware that he was visiting his mother alone she sent a letter of an accusing nature to his mothers address timed for his arrival. She sent a carbon copy to her other brother addressed to his place of work ( she also has issues with his wife). Well my husband after my urging finnaly called his sister in an effort to reconcile and when he questioned her about her treatment of his family, she could only offer weak excuses, no apologies. Well what this boils down to is that all along I was led to believe that her dislike of me was spurned by out visit to her home, but after her husband called mine, my husband asked what exactly his sister had against me, and it was relayed that it was because when they were a guest in our home we had a couple over that were friends of my husbands before we were married and they allegedly expressed the opinion that I married my husband because I was after his money and trapped him into the marriage by becoming pregnant. Her husband said that apparantely this was not true as we have been married for nine years now. As I see it she formed and opinion and was just waiting to validate it. After learning of this we have decided to permanently cut ties with his sister as she has a deep problem with me and apparantely had it from the beginning. Because she had a bad relationship with her father and my husband has been somewhat a surrogate father figure ( he's 15 years her senior), I feel she is jealous of his relationship with his wife and children. I regret that this has to be the way things are, but we do not wish to allow her to cause conflict in our family any longer. Any advice, I don't feel a reconciliation can occur until she can accept responsibility for her behavior and apologize. Do you know the type and should I not hold my breath.