<BR>My Husband looks at playboy magazies from time to time.. Our sex life is great and he says he loves me but i feel so inhibited about my body because i feel im not perfect like those girls are in the magazines.. IS he attracted to me anymore like he says he is?? Do all men look at playboy????? <BR> <BR>

Hi Jordene,<P>Your problem seems to be one that is very common, especially in this day in society, where all the "models" we are supposed to strive towards looking like are really anorexic, and starving themselves. <P>It is true that a lot of men do look at porno magazines even if they are truly in love with their wives. <P>This can prove to be a true problem area for a lot of couples - if the woman feels inhibited, like you do, she will withdraw from her husband, and the sex life will gradually perform a downward spiral which will lead to problems and resentment in other areas of the relationship.<P>I think what you should do is have a talk with your husband. A candid, honest talk, and tell him how you feel about his magazines. Tell him that you WANT to have a great sex life with him, and that you are not adverse to trying new things with him when you feel truly loved by him. Tell him you want to share your body with him, but you feel that he may not be attracted to you since he is so interested in these other bodies. <P>Hopefully, he will respect you enough to cater to your needs, and he will talk with you about his needs. Maybe the two of you can have such a great, open, loving sex life that he won't feel the need to look at these other magazines. Or maybe he'll just make you feel more beautiful than those other women, even if he does still look at them.<P>I think it's important that you not impose your own will on him, telling him that he canNOT look at the magazines anymore; that will only lead to resentment, and possibly his hiding of that particular hobby. IE/ you still need to respect him as someone completely separate from yourself, and if he decides to continue to read the magazines, then that is HIS choice. <P>The only thing you can control is how you react to it.<P>Also, maybe you should focus on yourself, and try to gain some self-esteem. Every body is beautiful, regardless of what the media "says" is beautiful. <P>Good luck!

Thank you so much for that reply.. It made me feel alot better about my relationship..<BR>=)

You are not alone! My husband also looks at porn, on the web...sometimes for hours. He claims he doesn't get anything out of it, and is just curious. He says he loves me and admires me too, although I am not model material.<BR>So don't worry, I think alot of men do that, and it shouldn't threaten or inhibit you at all, as long as he comes to bed and still wants you.

If your sex live is great, don't worry about it. At least from my experience, I was never comparing my wife to the women in the magazines. They're all air-brushed picture perfect photos and not reality, at least to me. It's like drooling over a Ferrari when you're driving a station wagon. I'm not really interested in owning a Ferrari, but they're fun to look at. I can appreciate your concern though. Just this year after some lengthy discussions regarding issues in our relationship did my wife tell me how much my Playboy subscription of years ago bothered her. But I'd never trade my intimacy with her for a moment with one of the centerfolds... (of course that was when we had intimacy, but I've already posted that story :-( ). Besides, if he reads the articles he may pick up some pointers on how to better please you!<P>------------------<BR>Prayer doesn't change things for you - it changes you for things.<BR>

I see your point of view Stardust. All I want is for my husband to find me as attractive as those models, if not more. The only thing that concerns me and im sure it concerns alot of women is, Do men fantasize about these women when they make love to their wives? I want so very much to hold his interest sexually. Our life is extremely hectic at times, I have 4 sons from a previous marriage and we just had a baby boy 7 months ago.. Raising 4 sons isnt easy and i just need and want him to look at me as a woman with needs instead of just a mom. I suppose i could apply myself more as far as attrativeness. Rarely do i apply makeup or dress pretty. Seems theres always so much to do with the kids and i have little time for myself. I just want the *Spark* to stay alive with us. I do feel alot better reading all the replies and i hope i can overcome my insecurities about his porn issues.<BR>Thank you so much to all of you! =)

Oppsss!!! I said in my prior reply that i have 4 sons from a previous marriage and just had another baby 7 months ago.. (( correction)) I have 3 sons from the previous. and another one now.. 4 all together not 5!!! whew!! lol

Dear Jordene,<BR>I posted a message for you in my topic. Thanks a lot for the reply and if you have a chance, go there.<BR>Claudia - Help... I do not know what to do