Hello-<BR> Here is my story if anyone could help I could really use it now. <BR>I have been married for almost 1 year and 5 months to the woman I love more than life itself. I am 20 years old so I married when I was pretty young to most peoples standards. Both my wife and I felt strongly in the belief of marriage so therefore we didn't believe in divorce because I don't see how something that is forever could end. Well needless to say (since I am on this forum) my wife told me on the 13th that she is leaving because she is not happy and has not been happy for awhile. To give you some backround on our marriage we had a hard first year, lots of fighting and not enough love making. I love her though and I always thought that would be enough....<BR>I just got off the phone with her and I have had my heart torn too even more pieces. She says the flame is gone for her and has been for a long time and our getting married was a mistake. This hurts so much. I need to know can we make right what went wrong? Can she feel for me the way she use to? Is it worth it? <BR>I feel the answer to all those questions is yes but she disagrees. I hope/want/need this to be right again she means everything to me and I cannot imagine, nor do I want to, my life without her.<BR>Please if you have any advise I am in need. <P>Thank you for you time-<BR>m.r.

Missing,<P>That really hurts. At one time I too thought I had things all in a row. I had my job and family and the future looked bright. However, failure to really know my wife, to really understand how she felt led to many many difficulties. In fact I had a silimar experience... like being hit with a 2"x4"... when my wife said similar things. The goodnews is that it can turn around but it takes much work... I would express to her that you too want the feelings that you used to have and are willing to work on doing whatever it takes to get there. See if she is willing to go to counseling or a weekend marriage retreat. Regardless of what she decides keep your focus maintain a strong relationship with Jesus for no matter what happens His love will sustain. You are in a tough and painful situation... read and learn about marriage and communication skills and seek counseling jointly if possible.<P>Best,<P>T2 <p>[This message has been edited by Triumph2 (edited October 22, 1999).]