Hi Quandry-<P>It sure is hard to keep trying when all those love busters have piled up. You try to let your Giver out, and keep the Taker under wraps, but with your sweetie's earlier harsh words ringing in your ears, it's hard not to speak out of the anger and hurt he's inflicted.... it's hard for him not to do that too. <P>But does hurting each other this way have to be the end? No - but only if you reverse it quickly! Love Busters, and the pain they cause, are a downward spiral. No amount of "working on" your relationship will help if your love is still leaking out through the holes the love busters have poked in your relationship! The good news is, treating each other well, communicating without fighting, and negotiating to make you both happy snowball too, in a spiral that takes you upward. You can reverse the trend lovebusters have started.<P>Here's something you might want to try. When my SO and I were in the middle of a really bad time, liable to break any second, we made a pact. For one week, neither of us would raise our voices at each other. Neither would snap, or insult, or criticize. I did slip and criticize him once during the week, he was upset I broke our pact but my sincere and profuse apologies brought him around. At the end of the week, some of the hurt had subsided, and we had some memories of spending time together again without bickering and fighting. It was a tiny step but it saved us when we were lowest. Maybe it will help you and your SO - I hope so! Good luck.
