I had an affair with a co-worker, we are both married. The affair was found out by his wife, through some e-mails I had sent to him. My questions is the following, through all this ordeal after she called me every name in the dictionary, I found out through her husband with whom I had the affair. That in their counseling session she admited to having an affair herself. I know that he shouldn't had told me about this, but I guess he saw what I was going through. When he told me this I was shocked and angry at the same time. Because all the name calling she said to me when she found out of the affair. She told me that she loved her husband so much she would never cheat on him. This really hurts because I'm not the only person who had an affair. I know that I can't confront her about this issue because it was brought up through their counsleing.<P>The other issue is that she wants to clear the air face to face, which I don't mind at all. The only problem with this is that, I know she did have an affair and I'm afraid of saying something to this matter. Please help.

Hey guess what, her having an affair doesn't make yours ok. Have you thought of your husband or has he slipped your mind. you seem more interested in how your feeling rather than the hurt you have instilled in some-one else. Clean up your own back yard before you start talking about some-one else mess.<P>Have you spoken to your husband about your infidelity??? Get away from this other man and start working on your marriage rather than trying to destroy some-one else.<P>Sit up and look in the mirror!! Who cares whether she has had an affair, this is for her and her husband to work out, how do you know if he (the adulter) is telling you the truth?? How do you know he is not telling you a lie to make you feel better, he has already lied to his wife, who to say he not doing the same to. How can you trust some-one that has done what he has done. Who to say that if you 2 decide to get together that he doesn;t cheat on you.<P>My advise to you is to get away from him as far as you can and work on your marriage and be honest with your husband, and don;t be surprised if he gets upset at you and this other man and wants to also "HAVE IT OUT"<P>Do something but think before you act. Good luck.<p>[This message has been edited by anthonyv (edited July 16, 2000).]