I'm at a very confused point in my life, my H moved out yesterday. I still love him, have offered to work at fixing the marriage, using the techniques I just found in marriagebuilders. He says that he just doesn't care enough and that it would be a disservice to himself to attempt it. I've learned so much in the past week reading this site, the messages, etc. <P>We have been together for 10 years 3 months, have 2 girls, ages 13 (mine from previous mariage who H adopted) and 9. We run a business together and he also has his regular job. He is a know workaholic, not happy unless he is doing something. He came in last Monday evening and said he was done, he would give me anything to just let him go, that he worked all teh time cause he didn't want to come home, that he didn't love me anymore. Mind you, this is the eve of our 8th anniversary, the girls had just come home from being with my parents for a month, and he drops this on me. we talk for a bit, he climbs into bed, sleeps and the next morning holds my hand and gives me a kiss and tells me to have a good day. He had just spent the eve before telling me he didn't love me, that the past 2 years have all been a sham. so I thought about it all, and decided maybe it would be best for him to leave as I couldn't take him acting as if nothing was wrong. I told him so Tuesday evening, and he sat around and came back in and slept in the bed again. I got mad and told him at breakfast that I meant he was to leave. I said not necessarily as an "end" to the marriage, but we needed to work things out.<P>From Wed through Monday, he would sleep in the motorhome at least, and he had set up to move into a rented room. On Sunday he was looking through the paper and invites me to go to a movie. He has talked to an attorney, but I am geting so many conflicting things going on I am in total limbo until he either says he will work towards trying to fix the marriage or I get served with divorce papers. <P>So many discrepancies to what he is saying, he is either a fabulous actor who had everyone fooled, or I am a complete idiot. yes, there have been troubles in the marriage, an undercurrant of something wrong, yet I didn't know how to fix it or even what it was. I now have an idea, we took to writing letters to each other as he was in the motorhome. It bothers me so much that now we have a basis in which to begin negotiations and he acts like it is too much bother to even try. <P>I'm rambling, so sorry about that. I suppose I want to get a feeling from people out there working on their marriages, or even ending their marriages what my chances are of trying to save this? Dr. Harley said that one spouse can bring a marriage back on track, but I'm not sure if my H is willing, or if he says that he isn't to strike back at me. I ordered His Needs, Her Needs and Love Busters... at least they will give me a better insight of what is happening. <P>Thanks for letting me chatter.<BR>