My H has been talking to some of his "girl friends" on the phone, behind my back. I caught him. He tells them "I love you." He says he tells all his friends that and that it isn't the same as when he tells me he loves me. I find telling your friends "I love you" to be unacceptable. I feel this should be reserved for family and your spouse. Am I being unfair? Does this seem normal to you? Should I ask him to stop?? I am really confused and hurt.

I responded to another post similar to yours:<BR> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000682.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000682.html</A> <P>No, what your H is doing is NOT normal or acceptable. And yes, you can ask him to stop and that is not being unfair.<P>Like I said in the above post, if you H is doing something that hurts you, it is also hurting the marriage. And if you ask him to stop and he doesn't, he is being disrespectful to you.<P>Same advice for you....get into counseling...both of you. If he won't go, then you go or try to talk to Dr. Harley.<P>I just can't believe these people....they try so hard to justify their behaviour....if they would only spend that same amount of energy on the marriage, it would be awesome.<P>Aloha,<BR>Mrs.O<P>PS How come your H has "girl friends??"<p>[This message has been edited by Mrs.O (edited March 15, 2001).]

Thanks for your reply. I mentioned it to him last night, but I don't know if it will do any good. He is bound and determined there is nothing wrong with what he is doing and I am just being jealous. It seems like all the friends he talks to are female. I don't know.

It seems really abnormal to me and I think he is lying through his teeth. I think hes got his cake and eating it to. Sounds like a playboy to me. I am really sorry if this is discouraging but I would give him an ultimatum, either it stops or......whatever you decide and just see what happens. Good luck.