My H and I have been having some problems lately and it all started out with him using the computer all the time to chat on the internet with girls. At first it didn't bother me but he started talking to this girl alot and now he is talking to her on the phone. He says it's only friendship and that's all but now he is telling me he is unhappy with our marriage and we need to do something about it cause he has been thinking of divorce. And that really scared me I didn't understand where this all came from. We have had our share of problems like every couple has and have talked about them. He says I need to show him that i want this to work he says I need to fight for him. He says he is confused and doesn't know what he wants to do. I told him we both need to work on this and he says until he sees that I'm doing something then he will try too. I think that is unfair. He told me that she makes him happy and that I don't. I do everything that I can to show him but it's like he doesn't notice and now all of a sudden this girl he has never met is giving him the attention he needs. I found out my husbands password to his email and I read all the emails this girl wrote him. She is saying she is in love with him and all of this stuff. He says she can say what she wants and it's up to him to do anything back. He says I'm insacure and that if I trusted him then I wouldn't care what she is doing cause I have him. But he doesn't even know what it is he wants It's like he is almost ready to give up on his family for this person. I told him I was going to do everything I could to make this work because I love him. But I hope that doing this it will make things change somehow. I hope by staying and trying that I'm making the right choice.

Please consider posting on Emotional Needs or General Questions forum. They get a lot more traffic than this one. <P>An internet relationship can be just as damaging to a marriage as a face-to-face personal relationship. There are many people on these boards who can tell you that from first-hand experience.<P>It sounds like you've started out in the right direction. Yes, it is possible to restore a marriage. Please read everything you can find on this site (if you haven't already) -- Basic Concepts, NSR's Welcome to New Members on the Just Found Out forum, etc.<P>Something to think about: Before you post very many personal details, you might consider changing to an anonymous screen name. You never know who will read a public forum like this.