My husband and I have been married for about 3 years now. Our first year of marriage was rocky due to money matters....but we were happy anyways. Then our thoughts of sexual matters started wondering and led to some major mistakes in our life. We had a 3some with another girl. All sexual relations have ended with her, but my husband is still bestfriends with her. I can't stand to look at her because she has stated she had feelings for him in the past and i wonder if she still does. I want her out of our lives because I feel she is destroying our marriage by still hanging around. What should I do? I am scared for our marriage and I am confuse on what to do now. Please help me! Thanks!

Dear Scared and Confused,<P>Welcome, this is the right place to come. Have you read the different sections on this site, about the Harley's philosophy, the love bank, point of joint agreement, etc.? One of our old-timers, NSR, has a post with links to all the important sites. <P>Read the general stuff and digest it. <P>And again, welcome. <P><P>------------------<BR>Looney Belle aias Bellevue

Welcome <B>Scared n Confused</B>...<P>(thanks... <B>Daffy Belle</B>... for the reference.)<P>There is a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... <P>It has a lot of quick links to many of the <B>most</B> important MB sites...<BR>Click here ==> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000553.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)</A><P><B>About your post</B>...<P>You may want to check out a couple of other threads...<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum2/HTML/000696.html" TARGET=_blank>getting over threesome</A> and<BR><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum8/HTML/000802.html" TARGET=_blank>What a Doozie</A>.<P>Do learn all you can... starting at the <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000553.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome</A><P>Do start on a <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A>...<BR>Check out my post <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000176.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A - 101 (2nd ed.)</A>.<P> <P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000254.html" TARGET=_blank>Jim</A> / <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000037.html" TARGET=_blank>NSR</A><p>[This message has been edited by NSR (edited May 08, 2001).]

You are right to want this person out of your lives. Have you discussed this with your husband?