My husband of 18 years got home from work three hours late yesturday offering he had met an old neighbor, a woman he once had a crush on, for lunch. Apparently, he had phoned her at work one day not long ago and left her an innocent message. She called him back at work, they met for lunch. He assures me nothing happened. It was just lunch, no different than meeting a male friend. He thinks all is ok because he was honest and told me about it. I feel it is inappropriate for him to phone her, at work or anywhere else, for him to invite her to lunch, for him to go to lunch with another women when he is married. He thinks I'm being rediculous and jelous. Is that true? I do feel jelous but beyond that, I feel it is wrong for him to go out with another women I don't care how innocent it is. I hate that I am left feeling like I'm being unreasonable. That he's done nothing wrong. I just can't bring myself to throw him a parade because he told me about it and didn't lie. I tried explaining that this is exactly how affairs start, an innocent lunch. He tries confincing me how much he loves me but words can be so cheep. I'm looking at his actions. Am I making to much of this?

Kate,<P>I would be upset too and feel very insecure about my relationship, men just don't understand that what they are doing sometimes and how much it hurts us. I wish I knew what to tell you to do, but I don't. Hang in there and I will be praying for you!<P>Thanks,<BR>Kaye

Ladies it was a lunch, yes men can have female friends without sex. Just like women can have male friends without sex. Friendship is good for the soul, gender shouldn't matter. Jealousy is satan's evil emotion, trying to interfere in your marriage, resist it and pray for strength.

Tell him you have no problem with him having lunch with his female friend and that you'd be pleased to join them. If it's truly just friendship....he'll have no problem with that. If he gets angry and bucks it, then you may have reason to be worried. Good luck