<BR>OK heres the deal.... ive been sepertated from my wife for two weeks. WEVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 22 YEARS. she packed and is staying at her dads about a half a mile away. i have a buddy he is a man <<<< uh i did >>>>> whom was my friend before considered my wifes friend also <<<< both of ours friend but remember, he was befriended by me, my friend first via a buisness trip. my wife and i have known him about 2-3 years now. it just so happens that my wife wife knew he was going to be in town TODAY (FRIDAY)<BR>, for traffic school, that he has to attend on sat afternoon .hes a truck driver as am i.im local , he just started over the road work. ok u all with me ) cool. so my wife calls him says shes bored will u come by my dads and pick me up so i can get out for a while and do something. so he does .now remember hes to return to driving dutys sat right after traffic schools over and that I AM unaware that hes even in town during this entire episode. so he blows right past me doesnt call me, stop by , nothing ,picks her up goes to my sons and his girlfriends WITH HER to visit THEM untill 10:00 pm that night.THEN I COME TO FIND OUT ABOUT THIS SAT EVENING. From my wife <<which is a good thing>> hehehelol she said she figured that she better tell me before i found out from my son . True very True. my response is oh ,,, then u went home after that ??? i asked ??? SHE says NO WE WENT TO THE INDIAN CASINO after that. OH REALLY I ANSWERD ,when did u leave from there ???? OH I DIDNT END UP GETTING HOME UNTILL AROUND 6:00AM THE NEXT MORNING. Needless to say i fell out of my chair. i was pissed !!! she says that nothing happened between the two of them .nothing attempted, they went as friends period .... end of conversation friends !! i believe her . i know for a fact she wouldnt be unfaithfull to me even during seperation. BUT my friend, old good old pal, buddy !! My thoughts are that he broke the unwritten rule among all men. especially friends. that being, u DONT go behind your friends back while hes seperated from his wife, PICK HER UP AND STAY OUT WITH HER ALL NIGHT AND NOT GETTING HER BACK HOME UNTILL THE NEXT MORNING. PLUS I KNOW CERTAIN TYPES OF MEN AND I FEEL HE FITS THIS CATEGOREY AFTER THIS INCIDENT.<BR>that being <<<< ill take my time make her think uhhh were good friends , then hahaha i can move in on her.maybe this is HIS motive, maybe ITS not !!! regardless UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES I FEEL THAT WHAT HE DID WAS WRONG.. I NEED YOUR OPPIONION FROM BOTH WOMEN AND MEN. you see shes mad at me, BECAUSE I TALKED TO HIM ON THE PHONE AND TOLD HIM DONT BOTHER COMING AROUND HERE ANY LONGER WHAT U DID WAS WRONG AND THAT WE ARE NOT FRIENDS ANY LONGER . WELL WHAT DO U THINK ??? AM I WRONG FOR FEELING AND DOING WHAT I DID.??? <P>

Shep4short,<BR> WOW, 22 years, That's a lotta time together. You said she has been gone a couple of weeks. Why did she leave? Maybe the friend is a way of getting you back. After, all seems she wanted you to know everywhere they went. And how long she was gone. I know I have done the same thing. She maybe trying to hurt you for some unknown reason. I know this is not the way a person should do it. But, as a hurt person, we react in strange ways. Are you able to sit and talk about problems? Do you both talk or just one sided conversion? This may or not be, you say you know she would not be unfaithful. My hubby thought this to after 16 years of marriage. But, after all the pain I went through it happened. Even though I really would have rather been home with him. But, we are unable to dicuss things I'm the only one who talks so, I never know how he feels. Does she know how you REALLY feel? As women all we usally want is to know we can trust and are loved, the rest comes easy after that. Squawmoon

THNX FOR YOUR REPLY . BUT YOU NEVER DID GIVE ME YOUR POINT OF VIEW ON THIS ISSUE . AM I JUSTIFIED IN FEELING THE WAY I DO OR AM I WRONG FOR ENDING A FRIENDSHIP AND FEELING WRONGED A A SO CALLED FRIEND????

I don't think I have enough information to give you an honest oppinion. How long have you been friends? Is your wife a friend with him also? Did she get along well with him? <BR>Maybe she was lonely and needed a friend to talk to, about you. If she is being honest and nothing happened I guess you move on. Your going thru a really rough time, and I would guess you are looking for answers in everything. Harley Recomends that we don't have friends of the opposite sex for reasons that things could happen, they start meeting some of our needs.<P>Have you considered phoning the friend back and saying that you were sorry for getting so upset. But that it is only natural for you to feel that way. And ask him not to go alone with your wife again, because you are still married and it hurts to much right now being that you are separated.

thnx for your reply one thing ill never do is tell him im sorry. besides i cant do that seeing that ill never speak to him again . :~))

i think you are justified in feeling the way you do, mad at friend and wife. Friendship and marriage is about forgiveness. He did not do anything with her, maybe you are mad, hurt you, he is your friend, try to work this out. If not, then try to get new friends and work out your marriage, 22 years is long time, so many years. Those vows are forever! <BR>sweeteeyore