I am a recent newlywed - June of 2001, as a matter of fact. My new h and I have known each other for eight years and this year marks it as a new start in life as husband and wife. We have lived with one another for the past five years. Recently, my new h and I have been fighting non stop. We have had fights before, but they are reoccuring non-stop. We are not sure where it began and are pretty new to this topic of marriage counseling. I am a little scared in preparing myself in receiving help. He is the one that suggested we have a problem and need counseling. Our fights start when one raises their tone of voice and the other rises also. It seems that perhaps because we were stress free in planning our wedding (his mother planned most of it) and we are receiving our stress now. We have been through far worse than this and I believe that we can get to a point to resolve our problem. He always starts by bringing up my past of flaws a lot in any fight we have, which doesn't make me feel like he has gotten over things. For instance, I was adopted and do not have a strong relationship with my parents, that he thinks that I am being treated the same by him that they treated me. I always tell him that I enjoy my life with him and it is non-comparable. He gets angry very quickly and screams if I raise my voice too. I don't believe that his drinking helps anything either. He used to have many drinking parties when he lived at home at age 15 at his house and his parents never really discussed this topic with him. When they took long vacations and he had parties, they would come home to bags of ice packed in their freezer and would realize he had a party but never said a word. I wish they had. He drinks between a 6 pack to a 12 pack a night and sometimes our frig is stocked with just beer. He had informed me once that he thinks he drinks too much more than he should but that's all he states. I always know when he has had enough and can tell in his mannerisms and he never believes me that I know when he's had enough. I wish I had a camcorder to reveal how mean he can be when he is buzzed. All I want to do is help him with his anger and drinking and apparently I can't do it alone and need to do it together. He has recently said that maybe we should give up and start the papers. That scares me because I am a type of person that never gives up and always strives to make a resolution. However, I am not licensed or have the know how to do this in this type of situation. I have gone through the site and am interested in some things in resolving. I don't want to fail at the most important accomplishment of my life - marrying my high school sweetheart.

Okay, there are a few issues that concern me. First, his drinking, if you knew that he had a drinking condition why did you marry him? You may not think its not that bad, but it can get worse, some people get real bad, you are only in the beginning. You both need to get counseling before you get into some serious trouble! You made a commitment to each other, and he is ready to bail out after only TWO months?? Marriage take LOTS AND LOTS of hard work. Try getting a counseler, talking things out, work the past issues out so they dont keep on coming up. Try to go to a marriage conference, go to familylife.com they have great conferences. Go to a pastor/priest get helpo now<BR>sweeteeyore