Since I am a homemaker I think about what we are going thru all the time. Everytime I see our son I think of it - everytime I look at something in our home I think of it - everytime I look at a picture I think of it. Because of this I come here a great deal and I make lots of phone calls!<P>Sometimes I want to talk to H - know where his train of thought is for the day. Well, we always check in at the end of the day to firm up plans for the evening - like what time is dinner, etc. When he did not return my call, I started calling periodically to catch him in his office. The bad part of that is everytime you call, even if you don't leave a message he gets a hang up on his voice mail - He was pissed because I even said I thought you went out. Anyway, he did not want to come home so after telling me he was going to work late (he would be home at 9), he went to bar and go home at 10:30. I was very worried because I have never not known where he was and he is so good about calling when he is late. I need to stop needing to talk about this - nothing I say makes a difference anyway. He needs to feel "safe" in coming home. I'll have to put my needs last as always if I want to save marriage. I am willing to do that. <P>I am almost ready to let go - let him find out the grass is not greener on the other side. By then I will have found someone who is willing to be a great father and a great husband. Why does addication blind so many people???
