My wife and I have been mrried for 3 yrs and we have a 2yr old. It seems now a days that we don't even know each other. She never wants to go out, even to a movie. All she wants to do is stay home and do nothing. I like to go out and do stuff but i don't feel right goin out w/o her because i really do enjoy her company. Thats anoter thing, I can't really get close to her anymore. She always withdrawls or has excuses to do something. Now granted, I'm not the perfect angle myself. I pretty much lazy around the house and I do spend to much time on the computer. But what can I do? I like doin stuff that I enjoy but I can't so I withdrawl myself. Another thing is that I think I'm somehow being weighed against some standard and the is disconcerting itself. There is more to this but it hard putting in words! If yas got any suggestions let me know, i'm really tryin to find someway to solve our problem. THX

A woman has the most stressful and tiring time of her life with a little baby. Here are some facts:
1. You have to have energy to have sex. She's probably very tired, especially if you're not helping around the house.
2. You're making your needs very clear, but it doesn't sound like you're very interested in her's - only how to up her sex drive.
3. Help around the house. Tell her to put her feet up and you'll clear up the kitchen, cook dinner. Don't do this once in a blue moon but regularily - on a daily basis just like she does.<p>Most important of all, a woman wants a man at her side not an overgrown adolescent. Help her take care of the baby, the house, the things that need to be done, hug her non-sexually, bring her little gifts. Don't expect sex as a reward for what you're doing, but I can guarantee that if you do these things, she'll warm up to you again. If you value your marriage, you'll keep doing these things for as long as you're together.

I agree with Miss C. Being a fulltime CEO,CFO,maintance and housekeeping staff of any family is a tiring and stressful job. Help out without being told to do so and especially not in front of your wife to "Show Her".
Do it daily, not just to get something you need. Remember when the trash needs to go out, when bills need to be paid, when the baby needs to be picked up from daycare, get up in the middle of the nite, etc. Hopefully you get the message. Look around right now, are the dishes done and put away, is the kitchen counter clear, are the toys picked up and is there a load of clothes that needs to be washed, dried, folded, and put away? Then why are you reading this message, get up and start getting from your wife what you really need!!!!!!!!!!

gotta agree...first off, you do need to get off your duff and help out around the house---she probably doesn't like doing it either, but somebody has to. Get off the computer, too. And a 2yr old can wear anybody out! You're gonna have to shoulder some of the load, there, bud!<p>She may also be depressed---which makes you want to isolate and withdraw from people. It can make you uninterested in anything that you might have pleasurable before--tv, movies, sex, even conversation. I would get her to the doctor.<p>I suggest doing the Emotional needs quiz together---it may open your eyes! It sure did for me. Maybe you think helping around the house is her #6 need but it might really be her #1 right now. Do that quiz!
As for being measured against a standard, I think we are all measured everyday by everyone, including ourselves. I get the feeling that you know you aren't making the grade <blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Now granted, I'm not the perfect angle myself. I pretty much lazy around the house and I do spend to much time on the computer. <hr></blockquote> So, change your behavior and see what happens.