I am recently divorced (wife's choice not mine) and have recently been told by her that God is telling her to try reconcilliation. BUT! It's not her will. She's doing it grudgingly. However, she says that she will give it an honest try. I'm trusting her that she is going to give it an honest try.<p>If that's not enough of a puzzle, I feel there are serious issues that she needs to work on like a problem with angry outbursts and poor money management. But she doesn't think these are a problem for her. She blames her anger on me (I make her angry) and she thinks she is a wonderful money manager. She's in the process of buying a house which I feel is a very bad move.<p>At this delicate time when there is a window of opporntunity (and two children's lives in the balance) how do I deal with negative issues which could cause problems with the reconcilliation? Leaving them unsaid and not delt with causes me stress and drains my love bank (and there's not much in the account already)<p>I can't get into see Dr. Harley until mid May. I don't know if these problems can co-exist with an attempt at reconcilliation. But also, I don't know if the reconcilliation would survive the turmoil of working out the problems. How do I deal with this?<p>Any ideas? Anybody else been in a similar situation?

A marriage reconcilliation is either true or false. If you go into this reconcilliation without revealing the whole truth, then you aren't being entirely honest and in the end, if these issues aren't resolved, then the reconcilliation can only be at best, partially successful.<p>The key is entirely in how you approach it. This is where you have to tread lightly in order to get your issues across without creating warfare.<p>Much luck to you.

That's the problem. She just isn't open to hearing that she has any flaws. I'm very diplomatic and calm in my communications with her. So I guess it's just hopeless unless she is willing to come to the negotiation table as a fellow, flawed human and not as the image of perfection. Wish there was a way to break through this stalemate.