Hi, I hoping this makes me feel better. I'm 40, my husband is 45, and we have been married 21 years; with 4 children - ages 19, 18, 14, and 11. We are both committed Christians. I am feeling extremely frustrated in trying to adapt, or correct the distress I'm feeling with working with my husband in his business.
My husband is a fine-artist, a painter, and the Lord has blessed him with a gift. We have been self-employed for 17 years. When the children were young; we were poor- it was depressing. As the kids grew up; I became more active in working with my husband to promote the business, and our finance's have improved.
Right now, I am my husbands full-time plus business manager for our publishing company. I handle sales, marketing, financing, inventory, and shipping. My husband creates the product; and my responsibilites lie in turning it into a profit. We sell across the U.S. and into Canada; so, the Lord has blessed us with success. The fine-art business is a roller-coaster ride; its very tough, I've tried to adapt to the highs and lows, over the years.
The problem is; my interest in my husband is on a serious decline - he reminds me of work. I still admire and respect him, but, I-m pretty ho-hum.
The last four years have been tremendous in growth for the business; I have been hoping that eventually I will be able to have a life outside of work tasks. I'm having trouble accomplishing that. Small business's require alot of time from the owners. My husband works too much also; and I am always feeling overwhelmed.
We out-grew our last home-studio; so, this past January 2002 we completed a 1-year build project on a 6500 sqare foot home/studio. We came in about 70K over budget; and that caused me some stress. This current quarter has seen a 28% drop in orders, so, that is a challenge to manage.
One of the reason's our business stay's competitive is that I do not pay myself a salary. My husband has promised me for over two years that he would find a solution to move me out of sales and the buffer-position between him and the outside world. He knows I need to have more balance in my life. With our budget-overrun on the house, (I tried to prevent it, who knows maybe we will eventually need all this space), and our drop in sales - I just shot myself in the foot. I'm not sure how I can pay for good help.
I'm pretty sure I have a good case of burn-out, most likely a depression. If my job was a job in the outside world; I would of turned in a 2 week notice two years ago. But, because my husbands income(and mine & 4 kids) is dependant on my job performance, I cannot quit until I find a replacement solution. I cannot even take a 2-week vacation, let alone 5 days because the place would stop running.
If you have any wisdom, encouragement, I would appreciate it, I feel alittle bit better. My husband if a very Godly man and good man; so, I feel bad complaining. But, I frustrated that I'm stuck in this spot; thanks for listening.
Regards, Viv
