Hi Ezra,
Yes our H's need to understand many things, but are sometimes very stubborn to realize that a new person is only a trade and nothing is really better or going to be. The H still has the same problems he had here, without counselling he is not going to figure all this out byhimself! I am very lucky as my love for my husband out weights the bad! I really do love him with all my heart. I think he knows this. He was always so sad when he came here, I thought it as bold, but do understand as he thought he was helping me in a samll way by mowing the lawn. Guess he did not have to care, but he did and that small gesture made my heart soar! Dumb right? Well I know now deep in my heart - had to sort out feelings that he will be home someday. I only hope it is with a new attitude and the determination to hold tight and do this marriage right. More communication will help lot! He hides like I do - we just do not fight much.
I am so glad you liked the definition of Love it is so very true. I think this is why so many marriages fail. In the old days marriage meant so much more and they stayed as society did not let them wander as much or they hid it well, but marriage was for ever not like today where they can just move on and even divorce court makes it way to easy! NO FAULT? Our Gov should make it a tougher law. To many children get hurt also and it is just not fair. Yes I love kids! Well I guess I rattled on long enough, but Thanks for your reply! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Hi Doreen,

I'm male and here's my two cents.
My heart goes out to you. I see the pain is exhausting. Everyday is a choice. You can hold onto this and deal with it every day or you can harden your heart a bit and stand up and go back into Life... Welcome back!! So what if he's gone.... hey whatever. You're strong enough to have held onto this pain for this long so surly you can put on your game face and get back into the game of Life!! Fah ged abow dem...Hey, go back to work and take your mind off of things. You dont' have any kids so dont' worry about it. Just move on.

Hi Numb,
Thanks for your reply I do need awakenings more often! I know I can be strong. This really took me off my feet as I did ever think that this H would be like this. He has always cared, and never lied, but somehow got lost. Well I will hang tough and try to go back out into life, but hard with no one as a friend or kids as they are all grown and go in so many different directions. My only daughter is in Va and so far away. We do get together on here though. My job is there, just waiting for surgery for a real bad tendon at this moment. They will not let me back until it is done as my whole arm swelled like a popeye one!Lol! I am a Nurses Aide so it was tough working since Oct with all this pain. I have a kennel that occupies me most of the time, but ya know how damn long these days are! Well Thanks again for the nice reply!