I'm looking for an outside opinion on my situation. My husband and I (3yrs) got a bit drunk the other night, watched a movie and went to bed. A good night all in all, but when we went to bed, he was obviously looking for sex which is almost standard on nights when we go to bed with alcohol still in our systems. But I didnt really feel like it, I was half unconcious when he started nudging at me and kissing me. Rather than try to form sentences and tell him I wasnt interested I just laid there in hopes he would fall asleep/pass out soon, then I could do the same. But he didnt that night. He kept at it, and although I appeared to him to be passed out, I became more and more awake because his intentions became clear. But rather than push him away or "wake up" or whatever, I laid there and watched wondering is he really going to do it? He did.... he had sex with me when he thought I was unconcious. Granted, he was drunk...but....ever since this happened...I'm sort of at a loss as to what to do. Do I confront him with the fact that I know, even though its quite possible he wont even remember and it would just make him feel bad? Or do I let it go? My husband is a sweet wonderful man, and it all seems like a dream, like he would never have done something like that, but I wasnt dreaming. And really I dont feel.. violated or anything, because I was awake, I didnt protest. If I had wanted it to stop it would have, I know that. But I have to wonder...would it happen again? And also, has it happened before? When I really was asleep? If it has happened in the past without my knowledge I'd call it rape, which is serious. I dont want that to be part of our realtionship obviously, but I know he'd never do it if he thought it was wrong and his judgement was sound. On the other hand, if I confront him with it, he'd likely beat himself up about it. And if I ask him if its happened before and it has, he may lie to me as he sometimes does when he's afraid something he's said or done will make me mad/upset. Plus.. its partially my fault for putting him in that position. Instead of being honest, I sat back and watched him make a bad decision just to see if he would do it or not. I feel bad about that.
So what do I do? Do I risk causeing him undue anxiety and bring it out or do I let it go armed with the knowledge that my husband is one of the top five most wonderful men on the planet, that it was likely an isolated incident brought about by too many glasses of cabernet sauvingnon?
