My wife and I have been having some problems for some time, but we are ususally able to resolve in a few days. This one has been going on for almost two weeks. We'll argue, she will usually resort to name calling (liar, a-hole,etc) say what she has to say and then the silent treatment. I would say that things are generally my fault -stupid things like this time - missing paying a bill or forgetting something - nothing major like infidelity. Married for 13 years, have 3 kids. I'm the sole provider and we struggle making ends meet. Just recently discovered this site and am overwhelmed by all the info & advice and am trying to apply the principles to our marriage. I know I'm not doing a lot of things right - meeting her emotional needs, being totally honest - but her passive agressive behavior is killing me. I don't even know how to approach her now - it's like I'm not even there - just totally ignored. She easily get depressed and lashes out at me & says some very cruel and harsh things, then clams up. Any advice would be very appreciated.

I can truly relate to the silent treatment. My recommendation is if you have not apologized yet, get to it. My guess is that you already have. Next is to give her a little something, flowers etc, and initiate general conversation about a subject you know she has an interest in. If that does not work, give her space. She will eventually come back. The key for you not losing your mind while this is going on is to occuppy yourself with something else (something productive so as not to cause more problems). Last, but actually first, pray about your situation and ask God to restore the best things back to you and your wife in your relationship. Hope this helps:-)

I am normally the "stewer" in my marriage.
Generally, if i was upset, I'd storm around the house, not talking, but ignoring my husband, entirely. Then after two - who know's how many days...we'd blow up.

I think it was very hard for me to confront my husband, when he'd done something to hurt me, upset me, sadden me. He was a good arguerer. (SP) something i was not. So instead, of trying to work things out verbally, I'd "get him to see things my way"....by stewing.

I think I really wanted to just talk to him, and say Hey, ya know...when you did this....it does this to me...but I was afraid....I would have liked some validation that what I was feeling, was ok. And then talk about how we could avoid it next time.

I am sick to my stomach. I have hurt my husband deeply with my negativity and hurtful comments - which were not true...just said to get a reaction and boy did they. He can hardly look at me. I'm afraid he will leave me - or at the very least emotionally leave me. I can't stand this. I do not know what to do. I've told him I'm sorry. I'm going to get some counseling but I feel so bad I just want him to hold me.