I posted this in the emotional needs forum and didn't get any real resonse so i'll try it here....

Hopefully I'm posting this in the right section since this is my first post. My marraige is falling apart (again) and I didn't even see it coming and now I don't know how to fix it. My wife and I had seperated two years ago and got back together about 5 months later. I thought things were better and we even bought a house. Now things seem to be back the way it was when we seperated. When we seperated (and almost divorced)2 years ago it was because my wife and I weren't really getting along. I was working all the time and she was going out to the bars w/ her girl friends constantly. Well, she took my daughter out with her one night(2 days before X-Mas) and didn't come home. When i got off work the next day half the house was cleaned out. She ended up telling me she wanted a divorce because she didn't love me anymore. Well, my 4 year old daughter ends up telling me that "mommy" has been kissing her "new boyfriend". I couldn't really handle my daughter telling me that and ended up in the hospital for about 2 weeks after alot of drinking that night and almost committing suicide. Then I got myself toghter w/ the help of friends and the military shrink that I was ordered to see by my Commander. My wife eventually called me and asked if we could try and work things out and I agreed. Things after that went well... until now! My daughter is now going to school, i still work 12 hour shifts, and now my wife has 2 part time jobs. She's become really distant and is hardly ever home. Oh, and she only gets Fridays off but likes to spend that going to the bars w/ her girl friends . I try to show her more affection and try to take care of the house work that she used to do before her second job. But, it doesn't help. I'm actually starting to feel used. Like she couldn't make it financially before (when we were seperated) with out me since she didn't work and now that she gets a paycheck every friday plus her tips during the week, it seems like she doesn't need me anymore. I don't know!!! Sorry for writing such a long post I just don't know what to do!!! Any comments or suggestions would be nice. Thanks...

Welcome to marriagebuilders. Sorry you have to be here buy it is a great place for help and support.

Sounds like you are not meeting each others emotional needs. Is there any way you can spend at least 15 weeks together doing fun things? Your marriage may depend on it.

See if she will fill out the emotional needs questionnaire found on the home page, and start trying to meet her needs.

You also might post on general questions - that is where most of the traffic is, and a lot of times (unfortunately) posters get overlooked on other forums.