My partner and I have recently got engaged.<BR>We are in a happy relationship, other than the fact that he has a close female friend that I feel sometimes gets in the way. They were best friends before I met him and she likes to invite him out without me - this happens often since they work together and therefore spend their lunch breaks together. I know that he is not interested in a relationship with her - they are purely friends.<P>The problem is that he discusses his relationship with me to her. This is a problem when I raise an issue about her to him, since she encourages him to stand up to me. At these times, I find it difficult to resolve our issues, because not only am I fighting with him, but I am fighting her through him.<P>I have asked him not to discuss our relationship problems with outsiders, to which he agreed, but unwillingly. He battles to see my point of view why he should not talk to her about such things, since he believes that the more opinions he gets, the more likely it is that he will find the right answer.<P>What should I do?<P>------------------<BR><p>[This message has been edited by Bev (edited September 10, 1999).]

I don't know what i'd do. I find it hard to keep from confiding in my friends about our marriage. Roy knows I talk to my close friends about almost every aspect of our relationship but our unspoken rule has been that it is okay unless my friends' opinions start to influence our relationship.<BR>I have friends who just happen to be men. Every day after school I study algebra with a guy from class. We talk about alot of things but he has never even flirted. <BR>It is difficult sometimes to be friends with someone of the opposite sex but I think that it is possible to be just friends as long as both respect the boundaries...<BR>good luck to you!<BR>jess<P>------------------<BR>No god, no peace; know god, know peace.<BR>