My wife has been pulling away from me for a year. Now I am out of the house. We have a 7 and 8 yr old. She says she needs time and space. Is there a chance and what do I need to do? How much space? How much time?

Dear cb:<P>What I experienced when mine were at the age of your two was basically an overload. My h was and still is a workaholic and I the at-home mom. It was my sole responsibility to care for the girls and my h, but there was nothing left of me for me. I often felt like hiding in closets (silly but true) hoping that he would miss me and regret the overwhelming responsibility that I was given. I hoped that my h would "wake up" and want to help physically and emotionally with the home-front. I hoped that he would want to help me become something that I could feel proud of, that I was "adding to society" in some wonderful way. I am a portrait artist, and I was so tapped out that creativity was the last thing on my list and really should have been close to the top. But I had so little energy that I couldn't get the strength to assert that need and "go" for it. What I needed was a "paraclete." That's a biblical term if you didn't know for a helper to stand by your side and support you when you can't. (I think) As far as your being "out of the house" all I can think of is something I heard in a seminar about the spouse who is leaving, the other spouse begins packing their bag too to go with them. NEVER NEVER let them push you away. You wouldn't do that with a child, and shouldn't do it with a spouse except if your life or a child's life is in danger.