I have recently remarried and have 2 children in school. My husband and I both grew up in the same home town and re-met almost 2 years ago.<BR>He wants to stay in the north and I want to stay in the southeast. It is not the same back there and there isn't much there as far as children's activities, parks, etc.<BR>It seems that there is more where I live and economically this would be the better choice. I have a good job here and my husband has an income from a retirement. If we go north, we will have only his income, which right now, is not enough to support a family of four. He wants to stay there for sentimental and emotional reasons and it seems, would be willing to throw in the towel to stay where he is. I don't know what to do.

I don't know if it will help anything, but I want you to know I understand a husband who wants to move somewhere you don't want to go. My husband and I move constantly. I recently put up a big fight when he suggested yet another move and a week later he told me he wanted to leave me. I doubt that this is the only reason, but I know that if I had realized how much it meant to him, it wouldn't have bothered me so much. Now I am stuck trying desparately to keep him here before he goes, which is in less than a week. My suggestion to you is to think hard about whether this is something that is a very serious issue for you before you make it a conflict. It sounds like you are most concerned about the financial implications. Is there any way to compromise? Perhaps suggest that you would be willing to move north if he has found a good job that will support you first? Or maybe suggest trying it for a time, say, 2-3 years and if it isn't enjoyable for you thinking about giving the southeast a second chance. Of course with school-age children, the prospect of moving frequently can be a touchy subject, so you may need to get their input on that. Good luck, not wanting to move when your spouse does is a very difficult situation. I'm sure with some understanding negotiations, you can come up with something.

You say he would be willing to throw in the towel to stay where he is! Well, call me Dr. Laura, but I firmly believe that the best interest of the children should come first. Were living arrangements determined before you married? Would he be willing to try living in the south for a couple of years? My feeling is, that moving and a new step-father may be just a bit much for the children to handle right now. But, of course, you are the best judge of that. You've got such a difficult decision to make. My heart goes out to you.