My wife came home last night,with a plan for are sepration.But first let me give you some background.We have been maried 18 years,have 2 kids,9 and 11.We've had problems over the years and drifted apart.Last mounth she went on a trip to "get away"was gone 10 days.Came back and in a week went to horse show with friends.While she was gone I found a hotel recipt with OM's name and my address.She said yes it was her boyfriend and she slept with him the whole 10 days.Two weeks later she sayes she is going on a buisness trip to the same state he lives,I took her to the airport and on the way confest to a brief affair I had 5 yrs. ago.I beged her forgiveness and asked her to give up OM.She is 46 he is 26,she came back and told me she's in love with him and dosen't know what to do.I was dazed and confused,but knew I was still very much in love with her.We talked and tried to work things out,that's when I found MB.COM it has helped me and I tried to get her to read some of youe info. but she wouldn't.Last night she came home from another trip and we talked for a wile,that's when she told me her plan to move to seprate houses so she can live with OM and I can be near the kids.This a lot to swallow,I don't want any part of him but I know she need to know if she should be with me or someone else.What should I do please HELP me.

You need to have a very serious talk with your wife. Ask her what exactly is the OM doing or giving her that your not. That would really be the only reason as to why she be doing what she is doing. You really both need to go to a marriage counselor, some real communication is not happening and really creating conflict between the two of you.

Your right,we have not been geting along for some time.I've been commuting a long ways for 12 years and working here on the ranch the rest of the time.She is very demanding but,I love her so much I can't deni her anything.We had a good talk and made some progres,she is going to look at the M.B. stuff I copyed off this site.We will have another talk when she is ready.She sayes that she wants to know if the problems are her or me, so she wsnts to seprate and try a relationship with OM.I'm pushing for staying together and seeking help.WE have a long way to go,but as long as we can talk and not fight I have hope.We're taking it one day at a time.Thanks<P>------------------<BR>