I'm not "legally" married but have been living with my partner for 4 years. I love him dearly. We have been through emotional rollercoaster throughout our relationship. It seems like the first year was our best year. I couldn't stand to be without him. I showed so much affection and wanted to make love to him all the time. Now, the desire is not there anymore. He is wonderful person. Granted in the past I have been involved in horrible relationships. Now that I am with someone who I have longed for in previous relationships, the desire is decreasing. He gets upset that I don't show the same affection that I use to when we first met. I can go without sex for months and not even realize it. I feel bad for him because his sex drive is high. He doesn't seek it elsewhere. He patiently waits until I make the move. Its so hard for me to do that. I get so caught up with my work and myself that I feel I don't need it. I'm concerned if Im just losing interest in him or its just a phase I'm going through. I just wish I could feel the same lust that I did in the beginning of the relationship to keep our love life ignited.
Any suggestions on how i can get that lost loving feeling again?

First, the thing you felt at the beginning of the relationship was 'infatuation' which by its very definition is short-lived and cannot be sustained in the long run. It is, however, replaced by a deeper, more consistent thing called love. <p>Second, marriage is hard work. You have to make an effort to keep the romance alive. You have to plan things to spark the interest. And you have to make it a priority. How much work you put into it is proportionate to how much you want it to work. We do make time and the effort for the things that are important to us.

If you love your husband and want to please him, how can you not want to make love?<p>People are supposed to put time where love is. Be Alittle unpredicitable about where sex happens.

Try this...PAY AS MUCH ATTENTION TO HIM AS YOU DO TO WORK AND YOURSELF!!!
You're lucky he hasn't dumped you. Open your appointment book and schedule quality time with him so he doesn't look elsewhere. If you don't keep stoking the fire it will eventually die out.