I have spent hours in Christian bookstores looking for answers to my marital conflict. There seemes to be no opinion on prenuptial agreements; am I the only one with this conflict?? I married a multi millionaire and signed a prenuptial contract that basically gives me nothing in the event of a divorce. That was OK, I am committed to making my marriage work. Little did I know, I sighned away all rights to be invloved in planning my future or my childrens future. I am excluded in all business dicisions. I recieve a check the first of every year to cover my personal expenses and this makes me feel like an employee. I do have everything I need financially, but that is not the point.<P>We have 3 children. We have been married for 16 years and dated 3 years before marriage. We are both devout Christians. My husband believes he made the money before he met me so it has nothing to do with me. We have spent most of our marriage in therapy with no results. This lack od trust and the need to be seperate from me is killing me inside. Please, somebody, write to me with a Christian prospective on this problem. Am I wrong to be offended? Am I wrong to have this issue live with me daily? My husband says I should not dwell on the issue because it does not affect my daily life. It offends me because it goes against what I believe a marriage is about.<P>Christian needing Bibical answer<P>------------------<BR>Sammie

Sammie:<P>I am not in your situation, but I have to say that I agree with your feelings on this matter. At your wedding, you and your husband (as did I and my husband) made vows to each other, and because of those vows, you entered into the mystical union of marriage, where God joins two people into one. <P>Your husband is called to love you the way that Christ loves the church... enough to die for her. To me, that indicates a profound level of trust. You are called to submit to your husband and to respect him. These two things don't happen in a vacuum. Your husband's sacrificial love should garner your submission and respect, and vice versa. However, where there is a lack of trust, it seems to me that this ideal of marriage would be hard to attain.<P>Have you spoken to your pastor about this? You did say that you've been in therapy... has it been Christian therapy? I don't know how "biblical" of a perspective I can give you, because, while I am also a Christian and have studied the word to some extent, I am certainly no bible scholar. <P>Anyway, to me, the bottom line is that it doesn't seem like your husband views you as and equal partner in the marriage. (Of course I can only make this assessment based on what you've written.) It says in the word that we are all equal in the sight of God.<P>Please keep me posted and let me know how things go. I will be praying for you and your family!<P>God bless you,<BR>Singer