Hi!<BR>This is the first time I write a message. Basically, I am full of doubts and confusions. I am 22 years old. I have a three year old daughter. Her father and I are not together, but we have a good frienship.<BR>When my daughter turned two years old, I started dating a friend that I had known for a year. We were the best of friends. Our relationshiop was great for a while. My mother wasn't too thrilled about the relationship, though, and gave us a hard time about it. I moved in with her after I had my baby so her presence was always felt.<BR>We moved in together eventually. That only lasted five months, though. All the stress my mother had placed on us and the fact that my daughter isn't his affected our relationship. We ended up arguing all the time. He even moved into the spare bedroom. I decided to leave because it was terrible living like two strangers in the same house.<BR>We have maintained our friendship though. We are actually better friends now then we were living together. I still have conflicts that I have to deal with and so does he, but I just wanted to know if there is anything I can do so that we can work things out. I would really like to help us and help him understand that even though my daughter isn't his, he can still have a "fatherly" relationship with her.

You should get married to the man or focus on your daughter and forget the man. Your daughter has you and her grandmother. And, if the biological father is still in the picture, she also has a father, who can act "fatherly" toward her. She does not need a pseudo-father-ex-lover hanging around to confuse her as she gets older. Are you worried about keeping the man in her life or in your own life? Just my .02

It depends what your arguments centered around. Were the topics worthy of arguing about?<BR>It doesn't sound like you have a firm foundation to build a relationship on with this man.<BR>If living with him for 5 months ended up as you living like strangers, then it sounds like it would only get worse, instead of better.<BR>I would suggest getting down to the bottom of the relationship and finding what it is based on. Is it mutual trust and respect?<BR>You and him need to openly discuss your future and be prepared to handle whatever may be said in an open, honest dialogue.