We have been living together 11 years. He says "for all intents and purposes, we're marriaged." Yet, two years ago he had an affair. The physical part of the affair lasted 10 months, and there was continued communication for another 6 months, until she found someone else. He admits that if we had been married he wouldn't have had affair. After discovery of affair, he promised we would get married, but since always has some reason/excuse not to. I am having a very hard time dealing with the lies and betrayal of the affair, and I don't think I can continue relationship without marriage. But I don't want to make marriage an ultimatim. Will marraige even work for us after so many years of living together? Need some advice!!