Alright, my wife and I have been married for 3yrs. When we were dating, we really didn't go out that much and do stuff together and really take the time to truely get to knwo each other. When we were dating, we pretty much stayed at her house and just did whatever,(so we really didn't create a base for a strong relationship), in the past we had many problems, but now it's more calm. We only dated for 5 months before we got married, we started talking through internet/ phone and that's basically how we met. We now have a beautiful and handsome 2.5 month old son, which we kinda have a problem where she gets very frustrated with me, cause I supposedly don't care for our son as I should be(in her eyes). The problem here is I work in the evening and early night, and she works part-time in the morning, and between our jobs and getting up during the night to care for him(feed him), it's made us very tired. We talked before that we thought it was a mistake not to live with each other before we got married. Now there are times that I still don't feel comfortable with our relationship as far as having a very strong relationship and having strong things in common. In others creating a real relationship. So I having been thinking back and forth wether to tell her that I think we should unmarry,(still live together), but in a way, start over as far as our relationship goes, rebuild it in just a manner where we are only living together and be with each other, just not married... Please help me.

Ummmm???? not sure what you mean UNMARRY??
how do you unmarry other then divorce!?

do you want to kill her spirit by telling her something like that? you will break her heart.

what did she do to have you do something like that?

perhaps your feeling neglected because of the baby
but then it won't last long the attention she has to give to the baby will change..soon it will be less demanding and need less attention as while it is this tiny,

but he still will demand attention from BOTH of you, it is not a puppy that you can put in a room and leave it there..it takes two parents to raise him, and share the responsibility for him.

what is it you want to do? what were your hobbies before the marriage?

are you saying you basically probably spent most of your time not doing anything because you spent it cuddling and in bed perhaps? before you were married?

so now you find yourself bored? what is the unmarry thing, whats up with that?
tell us about that, what it means. and what is it you want, you can change things now by being married..

did you mean so you can date others? see other people?

HAve you told her any of this yet?
what was her reaction.

I hope and pray you do not tell her because
you might end up thrown out or else whacked upside the head with a wet diaper..shish..
what kind of person would do this to someone they love..do you love her? does she love you?

please think about it seriously..marriage is a commitment even if you got married young, also if you did not do things before you can get to know each other now..build a foundation..on God..go to church have the baby dedicated..dedicate yourself to the Lord and start over with Him..

what religion were you raised in? find God again and then teach your son when he gets a lil older about Him and be the spiritual leader in your home..please don't leave her..you need to change..
if you want it to work..both of you probably do.
take care and keep on keeping on!
EarthAngel
check these out they might help

Building blocks to a strong marriage

when we don't measure up

helme26:

I read your post over 3 times .. trying to see if you really meant "unmarry"? I'm with the previous poster, the only way to "unmarry" is to divorce.

I am trying to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you mean that you would like to put your marriage on a better foundation.

Ok, so you married too quickly, possibly for some wrong reasons, BUT you made a commitment to your wife and you sealed that commitment by deciding to have your precious son.

Read over all this site has to offer as well as the link that Sad Eyes provided and keep posting.

There are people here that can help you.

I believe with the help of God and some retraining you can have the marriage you are dreaming of.

Diamonzzz

<small>[ June 09, 2003, 06:43 PM: Message edited by: Diamonzzz ]</small>

<small>[ June 10, 2003, 02:38 PM: Message edited by: Helen J ]</small>