ok before you read this please dont judge me or think im a bad person.cuz im not.Im only 22 and ive been with my huspand 6 years.do the math. We have 3 boys 4, 2 and 7 months
he used to be very hateful to me,he called me names like B------- stupid b----- dumb a---
cry baby. And i could go on,I work a full time job and take care of 3 kids and a house i cook i clean i do it all With no help.He would sit on the computer all the time.till one day i just got fed up the name calling the way he treated me.He would argue with me in stores he didnt care who heard us.i hated the way he talked to me in front of the kids.he was even hateful to them.SO TO MAKE THIS SHORT. Weeks went by and i started thinking about ex boyfriends and i was very young when i got with him so it was just puppy love with the other guys.(not too many)Then i started talking to this guy i work with.(just got a divorce)when he heard me arguing on the phone with my huspand and when i went in his office to give him something we started talking then we emailed everyday then IM every day he was soo nice to me. so i kinda leaned on him then i fell for him.then during lunch i went to his apartment with him(I KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING)one thing went to another and we went futher.So i left my huspand i felt like i didnt love him anymore my feelings for him changed.he couldnt belive i left i always said one day i would and he would say bye then.im back with him now (my huspand) hes trying really hard to be a good man and he is.But i just cant seem to stop doing what im doing.Sometimes i feel lilke im in a buble and i cant get out.i dont have strong feelings for the other guy anymore but i dont want to stop doing what i do with him.I love the way i feel when im with him. Sometimes i feel like theres someone else for me.My H is doing good but i knew it would stop sooner or later with him helping me .cuz again im doing by my self.theres so much in me i want to get out i think im just looking for some one to talk too.this isnt enough to even tell it all

I would say to you, get a divorce from your abusive husband. Then, wait a year and start dating other men. Are you too chicken to get a divorce and do it right? Don't be lazy, before you go out cheating, get a legal divorce and you can date around all you want. In fact, if you give the kids to your husband, you can have the freedom to date and even marry a better guy then your husband some day.

This is if you feel your marriage is a mistake. If you feel your marriage and having 3 kids was NOT a mistake, get into marriage counseling RIGHT NOW. To save the marriage and keep you from cheating.

CHEATING IS THE WEAK WAY TO LIVE LIFE. YOU WILL CORRUPT YOUR OWN HEART AND RUIN SEVERAL LIVES INCLUDING THE OTHER MAN, YOUR HUSBAND, YOUR CHILDREN, HIS KIDS, ETC.

Please get a divorce if you hate your marriage so much otherwise get into counseling, marriage counseling, with your husband and try and change things so you never want to cheat again.

STOP IT !

You will never be able to rebuild your relationship with your H while you are having an A.

If you care about your H at all, you wouldn't be doing this to him.

Does he know about your A? if not perhaps you should tell him and see how he feels about continuing to "Try to be a good man"
The Policy of Radical Honesty

If you don't care about him then listen to baba, let him loose so he can rebuild his life too.

You asked not to be judged, but you are what is refered to here as a cake eater.

Give up one or the other completely. If you must D then you must, If you must change jobs(easier than D) Then you must.