I love the marriage builders website and wonder if there is a divorce website as good for the us unfortunate ones who can't convince the other one to stay.

711,<P>That's the whole reason we asked that this forum be added. Some of us couldn't make our marriages work, but we still like the MB concepts. They are helping us grow and become better people. Plus we've made friends here that we just aren't ready to give up! <P>Stick around! We'll help you any way we can! <P>Mitzi

Thanks for the reply. It was helpful to read through the discussions. After reading through the reasons why people have affairs and what it takes to make a marriage work after that, I don't think I would ever have a chance of working out my marriage with my soon to be ex. He doesn't want to anyway so it doesn't matter. But, it made me realize that it is time to move on and stop thinking about him. Unfortunately, we do have kids so he will still be in the picture. It would be a lot easier if he would just be gone for good. But, no such luck, so I can only pray for forgiveness and try to remain civil with him for the kid's sakes and mine. So far, our divorce has been pretty amicable. I know we are both at fault for the failure of our marriage and hope to learn something from this so if I ever decide to try again, I might be successful next time. <P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mitzi:<BR><B>711,<P>That's the whole reason we asked that this forum be added. Some of us couldn't make our marriages work, but we still like the MB concepts. They are helping us grow and become better people. Plus we've made friends here that we just aren't ready to give up! <P>Stick around! We'll help you any way we can! <P>Mitzi </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>

My divorce was finalized on April 17th. I was doing fairly well for a while but now I have taken a major step backwards. I remarried after being single and raising my son alone for 12 years. Thought I found Mr. Wonderful. The year we dated before we got engaged went really well. My husband was raised a strict Catholic and used the religous excuse for not wanting pre-marital sex. The minute we married the nightmare started. We had a fairly normal sex-life for a few months (we were trying to have a child since we were both 40 and he never married before). As our problems got worse our intimacy complete stopped within about 3 months. We went for counseling at which point he told me that he did not have an attraction for women, told me that he would never and has never acted on being with a man. We continued to work on the marriage, but 8 months past with no relations. I would not force the issue because I tried to give him space, but he never came around. We had a huge fight 3 weeks after we moved into our brand new house, and my whole world came crashing down. When this first came out he told me he was so sorry to drag me into this mess and then he thought of all the women he dated if it would work with anyone it would have been me. No matter what I did in the marriage I was wrong. I was totally controlled by him because it was his way or no way, bottom line he took it out on me. When we split up he was so cruel, said that I made him think he was gay, that he was with many women and enjoyed sex and that it was just me he didn't want to be with. Then he proceeded to go full force with putting the house on the market, going to see a lawyer, spliting money, ripping up credit cards. What was supposed to be my dream ended up a nightmare. Sad part is that I strongly feel there were things in his past that confused him and that he probably isn't even gay, but he thinks he is. I am having the hardest time. There was no closure. He never came to me and changed his story or said he was sorry. I still have not let his secret out. I don't know when the pain will end. I come to tears everytime I think that this happenned to me and that someone could be so cold. I am really hoping there is someone outthere that can give me some answers or tell me where I can go to find out about situations like this.

711 - You might want to check out <A HREF="http://www.divorceonline.com." TARGET=_blank>www.divorceonline.com.</A> I have been posting there for about a year. There are a lot of interesting people there. When you get to the site, go to "He Said, She Said" - that is the name of their forum.

Thanks for the website info. I will check it out.